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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  Absolute WORST movie ever made?!? « previous next »
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Author Topic: Absolute WORST movie ever made?!?  (Read 8279 times)
G-man
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« on: September 22, 2003, 02:30:54 PM »

   I really needed to ask this question because I know that my taste is a bit weird, but I wanted someone elses input on this. I have a movie in my collection that I swore was the worst movie ever made...... "The Jet Benny Show"
I swear that it was made by a guy that one day said, "Hey! I've bot this movie camera. I know this guy that does a great impersonation of Jack Benny and another friend that does a good Princess Leah.....Let's make a movie!!!"
   Now I know that some of you are going to say that any number of Ed Wood's masterpieces are the worst, but I'd have to diagree.
   I recently had a chance to watch "Gummo" and it is by far the WORST movie EVER made!!!! It has ABSOLUTELY NO redeeming quality to it AT ALL. A total waste of money to rent it. Yes that's correct. I'm telling everyone NOT to rent it. It sucked that badly.



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"Why?!? What did she say?!?" -Ford Prefect
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The Burgomaster
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« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2003, 03:37:40 PM »

My vote for the worst movie ever made is CURSE OF THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN, which is available on a DVD double feature with CARNIVAL OF BLOOD.

HEADLESS HORSEMAN has no entertainment value whatsoever. It is poorly written, acted, filmed, and edited, and has bad sound. If you can make it all the way to the end, you deserve some sort of award. (I did it, and I still hate myself). This movie truly looks like a bunch of friends got together with a movie camera and said, "hey, let's make a movie." I have seen many bad movies, but this one is by far the worst.

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freelancePatsy
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« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2003, 06:39:09 PM »

There are so many...but the latest one I've just watched is one called "Vampyre". Nothing really happens in it, except for a bunch of vampires run amok in a small town where everybody dressed in either colonial period costumes or renaissance fair outfits (I wish I was making this up). The film also features perhaps the worst vampire hunter EVER, who really doesn't do anything to protect the townpeople until the end of the movie when he kills the leader vampire. All the other vampires die as a result...his excuse for waiting the entire hour-and-a-half of the film to do anything: "Some things must be allowed to happen".

They didn't even get the vampires any vampire fangs...

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ErikJ
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« Reply #3 on: September 22, 2003, 07:44:27 PM »

Satan's Storybook! The single worst movie ever made. This movie makes pornos look like masterpieces. This movie was porn star Ginger Lynn's first mainstream film. We picked it up thinking great T&A, boy were we wrong. The new meds have actually helped repress the flashbacks of this monstrosity. Try looking it up. Some places won't even list it and those that do, don't even list the cast or crew (what a surprise). I have written about this film many times so a quick search will bring up the many warnings I have posted on this film.

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« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2003, 08:02:06 PM »

Ah, this one is exceptionally bad.  Do I remember a horde of replicated fellows, wearing sunglasses, on hoverscooters?  Either that happened or it was a fever dream brought on by the movie itself.

And, yes, I have the VHS in my collection.  Make sure to check out Dr. Freex of the Bad Movie Report as "Maggot."  That would be the shirtless freak who keeps screaming and shaking the cage bars.

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Andrew Borntreger
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jmc
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« Reply #5 on: September 22, 2003, 08:42:03 PM »

I think I vaguely remember Vampyre...is it the one with a vampire chick who goes topless when townspeople are wreaking havoc?  Haven't seen it in nearly 10 years.

I'd say EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC is probably the worst movie ever made.
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Bubba
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« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2003, 10:24:38 PM »

For me it's a toss-up between "The Worm Eaters" and "Fist of Fear, Touch of Death."
The former is, of course, an utterly inept underground 'comedy' 'horror' movie. The latter is...well, let's not talk about it.
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BryceDavid
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« Reply #7 on: September 22, 2003, 10:24:41 PM »

I've seen a lot of bad movies these days (A Name For Evil, Slaughterhouse, Silo Killer, etc) but the worst of the bunch was Pledge Night. Totally worthless piece of junk.
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jmc
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« Reply #8 on: September 22, 2003, 11:53:09 PM »

I think it's worse when a big budget movie goes into the crapper than a no-budget film.   The fact that so much is spent to produce so little amazes me.
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Vermin Boy
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« Reply #9 on: September 23, 2003, 09:25:44 AM »

Night of Horror. Whenever my friends and I are staying up late and decide we need something to put us to sleep, I pop this one in. It NEVER fails.

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kirk
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« Reply #10 on: September 23, 2003, 03:08:00 PM »

The Pest.  

Worst movie ever.  If I ever meet John Leguzamo, I'm going to kick him in the nuts.  

Kirk
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« Reply #11 on: September 23, 2003, 06:07:25 PM »

Classifying 'worse movie' is very hard because there exist so many different angles along which a movie may be bad.  Production, story, acting, characters, pretensiousness.

I mean, a movie that may have cheesy sets and special effects (production) and unbelievable characters doing and saying stupid things can still be a lot of fun to watch if it doesn't take itself too seriously.  But another movie can have a huge production budget and still be really irritating if it has a monumentally stupid premise and takes it really seriously.  But which one is really 'worse'?  The second is is done much more 'professionally' so it's hard to say it's completely bad because it can have good elements.  The first cannot be said to be good in any professional sense but it can invite the viewer into a silly world of the filmakers design.  There's just really bad in different ways and it takes a certain amount of willingness to go along with it for one to enjoy either of them.  And different people are willing to suspend judgement along different lines.


To me, a movie is 'good' if I don't regret the time watching it and 'bad' if I finish it up and feel like I've wasted my time.  There are a lot of arguably very bad movies I kinda enjoyed ("Nemesis" and "Robot Holocaust" being two).

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G-man
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« Reply #12 on: September 23, 2003, 06:18:11 PM »

   Vermin....I feel the same way about the Jet Benny Show. Whenever I have insomnia, I pop that tape in. Knocks me out about a third of the way through. Still don't think I've ever seen the entire movie. And yes, Andrew, flying replicants wearing sun glasses.  That's the movie. But still not as bad as Gummo. And I did notice that noone did bring up ANY of Ed Wood's pictures. Was that on purpose, or is it just implied that if it's Ed Wood....It's horrible. I was waiting to see Striptease...I mean Orgy of the Damned. But thanx all of you for letting me know that it's not just me and some movies just suck......and not in a good way.





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"That was easy" -Man and for an encore, goes on to prove that black is white and gets run over in the next zebra crossing.
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freelancePatsy
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« Reply #13 on: September 23, 2003, 06:45:57 PM »

Yep, that's it...the topless vampire girl riding around on horseback. I thought I was going to die laughing when the throng of vampires screech to a halt when they get to the flimsy wooden cross that the hero sets up to keep them out of the little town, only to have the "fiendish doctor who's in league with evil" toss it to the ground. A lesson learned here: Flimsy wooden crosses only work against the undead if they're upright.

At this point I must warn every single soul reading this: Normally, topless women riding around on horseback sounds like a cool thing to have in a movie...believe me, this normally cool thing isn't nearly enough to save this turd. STAY AWAY!

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mr. henry
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« Reply #14 on: September 23, 2003, 10:32:34 PM »

i still say Beast of the Yellow Night is the worst.

i truly can't figure out what is going on for the whole damned thing.

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