OT: Your Significant Other (and my poor prospects)

[Chopper]

"I'm only mad at those who look at single people like they're a freak of nature. Then the single people begin to feel like that."

true, when anyone is forced to live within the norms of the current society they live in they start being forced to be adapted to them. like with me, i'm 23, still single and no kids. however i started feeling lonely because in the military it seems like everyone gets married right out of high school and has a kid when they're 20-21. a lot of them get divorced, some don't, i don't know the exact figures, i'm not the pinhead who gets paid by the government to collects these stats.
my point being: i realized it wasn't me with the problem. because i'm not like all the other idiots who went and had a kid/got married when they were way too young so now they'll have to stay in for the rest of their lives!! atleast i'm free to do what i want to, wether if it's getting my degree and getting out, or becoming a professional mercenary in the congo!

[Brother Ragnarok]

My opinion:  You can't get chicks because you use the word "thang."  ;)

Brother R

[The Burgomaster]

My wife and I got married in Las Vegas.  She is from Brazil and her visa was going to expire, so we got married.  Our plan was to have a formal wedding the following year and invite family and friends.  We actually planned a wedding for about 175 people and put a deposit on the function hall.  A few months before the wedding, our apartment was burglarized,  They stole everything of value that we owned . . . and we had no insurance.  We decided to postpone the wedding, but one thing led to another and we never rescheduled it.

We have been married almost 10 years now . . .

[trekgeezer]

I actually asked my wife out the first time to make someone who worked for her jealous, but  that certainly backfired.  We were talking about getting married within three weeks of our first date, officially were engaged in less than two months and married within five.  That was over 22 years ago  and we are still going strong.

We've lived in three states, raised two kids (21 and 19), and been through a lot of  that life stuff.  She was divorced with no kids when we married and I have never actually seen the guy.  


Just watch for your chance, but keep in mind that  sometimes fate will hit you on the head when your not looking.

[Lee]

You know, I don't even really belong here(I'm 22 and single) but I just wanted to put in my two cents. The first time my mom went to a bar she got hit on. The guy that asked her to dance I call dad. My mom's friend Nancy met her husband while driving down the street one night. From all the people who are married that I've talked to about this they all say the same thing,"When the right person comes along, you'll know it."  On the other hand, My uncle is in his 50's, single and perfectly happy. The way I see it, if I find the right woman, I'll mary her and probably have a few kids. If I don't, oh well.

[Eirik]

ASHTHECAT - My wife was a co-worker of a friend of a fried.  One day, my friend called and said his friend's work (a restaurant) was having a Christmas party, and he wanted to know if I felt like dropping in for a few free drinks.  I had plans to hang out with another friend and almost declined...  but my other friend's girlfriend ha been getting on my nerves, so I cancelled on them and went to the Christmas party instead.  So I met my wife through a friend of a friend at a party I honestly almost didn't go to.  I was 24 at the time.  It's like lightening, dude, it'll be random and when you least expect it.

I proposed 1 1/2 years later at a graduation (for me from grad school) party in front of everyone with her not expecting it.  I scored huge points for that from everyone except my single guy friends who were there with their long-term waiting-for-a-ring girlfriends - those guys were p**sed.

We got married at the Chapel at Georgetown University in Washington DC, which I am told was in The Exorcist (haven't seen it since the wedding, so I can't confirm that), which is a neat Horror Movie tie-in.  Honeymooned in Europe which rocked.

Marriage is great...  for me.  I honestly believe it isn't for everyone - something to at least consider.  And I urge you never to do it just for the sake of doing it or just because your mom wants you to.  My wife and I get along better than anyone we know...  but it's HARD WORK.  Good marriages don't just happen because two people are right for each other.  I don't care how right two people are - it's an uphill climb.  And I say this as someone with few financial worries and three so-far healthy kids.

Your two hang-ups (age and she already has kids) are completely understandable, to me at least.  Generation gaps are huge and also consider that someone who is 20 may not want to marry or have kids for a long while - she'd be at a different stage of her life.  You two would be on different schedules.  Also, maybe this is cold, but I just don't think I would ever want to raise and support someone else's kids.  But there are men better than me out there who will, and my hats off to them for being able to do that.

Anyway, for what it's worth, there's my opinion.  Good luck.

[jmc]

I never thought I would get married.....


For what it's worth, my mom probably is never going to be a grandmother either.

[raj]

39, still single, and as I get older, I get more set in my ways, and have even less desire to get married.  My mom can't understand someone not wanting to get married, but I guess I take after my uncle, who's in his sixties and never married.

I know of people who'll go from one relationship to another just because they seem to need to be with someone.  I'm probably just the opposite.  I've got no "need" to be in a relationship, but if the right one comes along, then fine.

[jmc]

That's a healthy attitude.   It's much better than flailing around desperately.  I spent some miserable times with activities and people that I really wasn't interested in just in the hopes that I would "meet someone."  

One thing about being married....I don't know if I would have been as diligent about keeping healthy if my wife wasn't there to prod me into it....we discovered a couple of serious health problems I didn't know I had that probably would have caused me a lot of trouble in a few years.  Without my wife, I doubt I would have bothered to get checked out until something bad happened.