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The truly terrible joke thread

Started by Trevor, March 01, 2010, 08:28:37 AM

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Trevor

Two guys are swimming in the ocean off Durban, South Africa, when one of them turns around and sees two fins heading towards them. He grabs the other guy and tells him "Look at that!" The other guy goes  :buggedout: :buggedout: and says "If that isn't a 1958 Cadillac, we're in deep sh*t!"  :teddyr:
We shall meet in the place where there is no darkness.

Leah

What is an owl's favorite subject at school? Owlgebra
yeah no.

Mr. DS

Where does a snowman keep his money? 

In a snow bank
DarkSider's Realm
http://darksidersrealm.blogspot.com/

"You think the honey badger cares?  It doesn't give a sh*t."  Randall

Ed, Ego and Superego

Why don't cannibals like clowns?

They taste funny.
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?

Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes

Jack

What's Mary short for?
She's got no legs.
The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.

- Paulo Coelho

Leah

What did Delaware? Her New Jersey. (Sorry if i hurt anyone's feelings)
yeah no.

Joe the Destroyer

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Silverlady



If you threw a brunnette and a blonde up in the air which one would come down first?
The brunnette ... the blond would have to stop and ask for directions first.
Hold onto your dreams ....

Cthulhu

Why did they bury the indian behind the mountain?
Because he died.

There's an other version of this, too:

Why did they bury the fireman behind the mountain?
Because that's where the cemetery is.

Mr. DS

Why did Piglet stick his head in the toilet?

He was look for Pooh.
DarkSider's Realm
http://darksidersrealm.blogspot.com/

"You think the honey badger cares?  It doesn't give a sh*t."  Randall

JJ80

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?

Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot.........
There are few things more beautiful than a sporting montage with a soft-rock soundtrack

Sleepyskull

A man walks into a bar. He said, "OUCH!"
Humanity takes itself too seriously. It is the world`s original sin. - Oscar Wilde

Allhallowsday

A man walks into a cafe and orders a cup of coffee, no cream.  A moment later, the waiter comes back and says, "We're out of cream.  Can it be no milk?"
If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!

Paquita

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants.  The bartender asks "Hey, why do you got a steering wheel on your pants?" and the pirate says "Arr! It's drivin' me nuts!"  :bouncegiggle:

Saucerman

This one's for Indianasmith...

Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?

A: Because they have big fingers.