THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW
AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION SCRIPT PAGE 12 |
| Frank-N-Furter | I'll tell you once, I won't tell you twice! You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. Your apple pie, don't taste too nice. You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. I've laid the seed, it should be all you need. You're as sensual as a pencil, wound up like an E or first string. When we made it didn't you hear a bell ring? You've got a block? Well take my advice, you'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. The Transducer, will seduce ya! |
| Janet | My feet! I can't move my feet! |
| Dr. Scott | My wheels, my God I can't move my wheels! |
| Brad | MY SOCKS! It's as if we're glued to the spot! |
| Frank-N-Furter | You are, so quake with fear you tiny fools! |
| Janet | Oh, we're trapped! |
| Frank-N-Furter | It's something you'll get used to, a mental mind fuck can be nice! HEY DOESN'T ANYBODY USE THE DOOR IN THIS PLACE? |
| Dr. Scott | You won't find Earth people quite the easy mark you've imagined. This Sonic Transducer, it is I suppose, some kind of audio-vibratory, physio-molecular, transport device? |
| Brad | You mean? A VIBRATOR! |
| Dr. Scott | Yes Brad, it's something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it. A PERFECT VIBRATOR! A device which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space and who knows, perhaps even time itself! A PERFECT, PORTABLE VIBRATOR! |
| Janet | You mean he's going to send us to another planet? |
| Frank-N-Furter | Planet, Schmanet, Janet! You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. You'd better wise up, build your thighs up, you'd better wise up... |
| Criminologist | And then she cried out! |
| Janet | MORE! Stop! |
| Frank-N-Furter | Don't get hot and flustered! HOW DO YOU MAKE A HOT DOG TASTE BETTER? Use a bit of mustard! |
| Brad | You're a hot dog, (CHUCK HOT DOGS.) but you'd better not try to hurt her, Frank Furter! |
| Dr. Scott | You're a BUTT DART! hot dog, but you'd better not try to hurt her, Frank Furter! |
| Janet | You're a hot dog! NICE TITS JANET! |
| Columbia | My God, I can't stand any more of this. First you spurn me for Eddie and then you throw him off like an old overcoat for Rocky. You chew people up and then you spit them out again. DO YOU LOVE ME? I loved you... I CAN'T HEAR YOU. Do you hear me? I loved you. And what did it get me. yeah I'll tell you, a big nothing. You're like a sponge, you take, take, take and drain others of their love and emotion. Yeah well, I've had enough. PEEK A BOO! You've gotta choose between me and Rocky, so named because of the rocks in his head. JESUS CHRIST, WHAT A BITCH, QUICK MAGENTA THROW THE SWITCH! SANDY DUNCAN? |
| Frank-N-Furter | It's not easy having a good time. SO TRY DISNEYLAND. Even smiling makes my face ache. SO BITE YOUR KNUCKLE. GO TO YOUR FAVORITE RED WALL. And my children turn on me, Rocky's behaving just the way that Eddie did. Do you think I made a mistake, splitting his brain between the two of them? |
| Magenta | I grow weary of this world, when shall we return to Transylvania huh? TAKE A QUAALUDE BITCH! |
| Frank-N-Furter | Magenta, I am indeed grateful, to both you and your brother Riff Raff. STROKE, STROKE, STROKE. You have both served me well. Loyalty such as yours shall not go unrewarded. You will discover, that when the mood takes me I can be quite generous. |
| Magenta | HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE FOR BLOWJOBS? I ask for nothing, Master! |
| Frank-N-Furter | And you shall receive it, in abundance! WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? Come! We are ready for the floor show. IF ANYONE HAS SEEN MAGENTA'S EYES, PLEASE RETURN THEM TO THE FRONT DESK. ELBOW SEX, ELBOW SEX! THE HANDICAPPED ARE ALWAYS GETTING FUCKED OVER! |
| Criminologist | So, by some extraordinary coincidence, fate it seemed, had decided that Brad and Janet should keep their appointment with their friend, Dr. Everett Scott. But it was to be in a situation which none of them could have possibly foreseen. And just a few hours after announcing their engagement, Brad and Janet had both tasted... FRANKIE! ...forbidden fruit. This in itself was proof that their host was a man of little morals and some persuasion. What further indignities were they to be subjected to? And what of the floor show that had been spoken of? WHERE DO YOU MASTURBATE? In an empty house? WHEN DO YOU MASTURBATE? In the middle of the night? BEST TIME! WHAT DEMENTED CHICKEN STEPPED ON YOUR FOREHEAD, SAT ON YOUR CHIN, AND ATE YOUR FUCKING NECK? What diabolical plan had seized Frank's crazed imagination? What indeed? From what had gone before, it was clear this was to be A PICNIC? no picnic.
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