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Rated R
Copyright 1984 Tymar Film Productions.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Anders Anderson - Alien scout, his real name is Kator.
  • Jessica - Bisexual, rather codependent, who runs around in transparent clothes. Anders eats her after sex (literally).
  • Joe - Jessica's jealous lesbian lover, she is munched by Anders.
  • Simon - Jessica's previous boyfriend who we gather was killed by Joe.
  • Wally - Jessica's parrot. I know, but I'm dying for characters here! Is eaten by Anders.
  • Two cops who wander through - Eaten by Anders.
  • The Fox - Wrongly blamed for eating the chickens (guess who ate them). Eaten by Anders.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

This movie is bloody bad I tell you, no wonder England lost the War of Independence. Yes this film has changed history, Einstein never thought of it but the closer a country is to a movie of this foulness the harder it is for them to win a war (EMC+Alien Dead/vampire fangs=total crap). These two lesbians are living together (Of course only one is attractive, the other looks like a man baby!) in the backwoods when a alien scout lands on Earth. Alien scout might be a little misleading, it's this skinny British guy who sometimes transforms into a skinny British guy wearing vampire teeth. Despite Jessica's gratiutous nudity the plot drags on and on... ...and that damn scene where Anders is drowning in slow motion! Of course there is a stirring sub plot involving Joe killing anyone showing romantic interest in her woman, which lays groundwork for Anders' and Jessica's sex scene. Unfortunately he gets a little too excited and rips her neck out, not unusual considering the fact that he eats every other character including the parrot! This is a painful film, keep away from children at all costs.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Feral alien things are balked by flimsy doors if they're locked.
  • Blindly chucking a log into the thicket will hit your target every time.
  • The Brits have made more mistakes than just America.
  • Aliens are completely obsessed with parrots.
  • Kicking dead chickens for being dead is rather unproductive.
  • Partys should be held for good reasons, killing a fox is not among them.
  • Grown men and women play hide-n-seek.
  • Spacefaring alien races have no idea what water is.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 6 mins - What the heck made a ripping sound?
  • 14 mins - He's limping so she wants to offer him water, how about a crutch you moron?
  • 28 mins - Not the best way to compliment her cooking, gagging and throwing it up...
  • 35 mins - Lesbian scene! Okay, now change the angle. Get some more light in here!
  • 50 mins - Clear and non-bubbling Champagne huh?
  • 60 mins - Jessica doesn't notice Joe is holding that huge knife?
  • 68 mins - Anders is drowning in two feet of water?

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

Green Music Note alienprey1.wav Jessica: "I saw it I tell you! I saw it, it came from the sky!"
Green Music Note alienprey2.wav (Gunshot) Joe: "Oh Shit! Shit I missed, I missed, I missed the bloody thing!"
Green Music Note alienprey3.wav Jessica: "Yes, to the fox! If it wasn't for the fox we wouldn't have anything to celebrate."
Green Music Note alienprey4.wav Anders: "Kator calling command ship, send advance parties immediately. Have now established humans high in protein...and easy prey."

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 


 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipalienprey1.mpg - 2.5m
The slow motion "drowning" scene.

(Very painful.)

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 2 [3] 4
Alien Prey
Reply #17. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Mikey Misconduct
Alot of it made me laugh, but I think this is one of those "good" bad movies. The cover art amkes you think it'll be some fuclified gore-fest, but still, this was entertaining as all hell. Go rent it and laugh yourself silly.
Alien Prey
Reply #18. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Brad
 Yeah I unfortunatly saw it. It sucked, it really sucked, even the lesbians couldn't even save it.
Alien Prey
Reply #19. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Arm Commander
KILL IT!!! KILL IT NOW!!! This movie has to be salvaged to the pit of the Inferno before it's too late! It is the Great Evil... and as an Slayer of Evil, you must send Alien Prey to hell where it belongs, and hope it won't emerge from here!
Re: Alien Prey
Reply #20. Posted on March 09, 2007, 02:16:33 AM by fortunato
I've never seen this film, but the soundbytes on the review are frickin' hilarious. I especially love the line "This is MY HOUSE, REMEMBER!" It reminds me a little of my sister...
Re: Alien Prey
Reply #21. Posted on April 21, 2007, 09:47:05 AM by harley

i loved this film. for the low budget it had, and it had to have been low, it was great. it had it all, lesbians, missing animals, an alien who couldn't swim in 2 feet of water, and a protein mission.
great stuff..
Re: Alien Prey
Reply #22. Posted on May 02, 2007, 11:17:25 AM by Flangepart
Now, if the title was ALIEN PRAY, you could do a movie about intersteller Mormons from Alpha Centauri.
I mean, you could...
Re: Alien Prey
Reply #23. Posted on May 04, 2007, 01:14:44 AM by Frank
I just found that Alein Prey is the original title of the worst, and now listen hard, THE WORST MOVIE I ever watched! The french title I own is La Maison Sanglante (means: the bloody house) I decided to keep the tape because I love horror movies, but never, ever, I could found something as bad as that piece of your mother's s**t.
Now come and tell me that Scream was bad, Freddy vs Jason was bad or, lets say, one of your family member just died in a car accident involving a drunk driver, I'll say NO! That is not bad at all. You know what is bad? THAT!!!! This is Alien Prey! This about a so called alien coming to earth with a so called UFO that goes like: now what I'am supposed to do? Why don't I take a tea with these 2 lesbians? I mean, there are only like 7 characters in the whole movie and they all die, so I should eat and play hide and seek with these 2 welcoming hosts!

I'll stop now, you know I could continue for a long time still. I watched this movie 7 years ago already, now I'm 22. I'm still haunted by the feeling, THAT feeling of boringness... Please someone kille me now.
Re: Alien Prey
Reply #24. Posted on May 17, 2007, 10:51:31 AM by Flangepart
I'll stop now, you know I could continue for a long time still. I watched this movie 7 years ago already, now I'm 22. I'm still haunted by the feeling, THAT feeling of boringness... Please someone kille me now.
BANG! Hope he's happy....
Friends, let us come not to bury Frank, but to praise him, for he knew what had to be done, and it wasd done.
Now, if you could only kill a movie!
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