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BODY MELT - 3 Slimes
Not Rated
Copyright 1993 Body Melt Pty Ltd and Dumb Films/Australian Film Commission/Film Victoria.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Sam Phillips - Gnarly old Australian Cop, does not drink alcohol.
  • Johnno - Rookie cop, he has some affections for waterfowl.
  • Shaan - In charge of the Vimuville heath spa, her head collapses.
  • The Nobles - Family, dad has this horrid jogging suit (he turns into snot), mom's tongue chokes her, the son dies rollerblading, and daughter is left for the asylum.
  • Sal and Gino - Two young lads out to get laid, both fall prey to a random family of genetic freaks.
  • The Rands - Family expecting their first baby, she has some problems and her placenta attacks him.
  • Paul Matthews - Bachelor, not very hard to see why.
  • Dr. Carrera - Developer of Vimuville's amazing vitamins.
  • Pud - Dr. Carrera's partner at one time, stole a necessary ingredient of the superdrug.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

This movie is just plain ODD!

Vimuville is a drug company experimenting with new vitamins. Unfortunately, for the unknowing people experimented on, they do not work quite right. Prepare to see body organs and an esophagus more times than you might like - along with some dude gulping dishwashing liquid. There is also a group of freaks who are thrown in for no apparent reason other than to eat Sal and Gino. (They also kill a Kangaroo and eat the adrenal gland from it.)

Sam and Johnno finally pinpoint Vimuville for the disgusting meltdowns but not until every innocent bystander (except the Rands daughter) meets their end. Add to all this a techno soundtrack befitting a Tracy Lords' film and you're dealing with pure genius.

I really liked this movie. It was offbeat and kept me interested the entire time.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Australia looks just like Texas, but with alot of British-descended people.
  • Don't drink dishwashing detergent and drive.
  • Punk rocker chicks and bag ladies are not, repeat not, attractive.
  • Every movie needs a three-legged dog.
  • There are darn few normal people in Australia.
  • Inbreds eat people.
  • A woman's placenta is fully capable of self-locomotion and will harbor resentment against the father.
  • Snot is also mobile.
  • Masturbation may cause spontaneous penis explosion.
  • You can never get enough footage of an esophagus, Hollywood take note... ...Schindler's List, great movie but no esophagus.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 5 mins - Here we go with the porn music.
  • 6 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 11 mins - What the hell kind of jogging suit is he wearing?
  • 19 mins - The music in this movie is oddly arousing.
  • 22 mins - Why does this guy keep longing for ugly women?
  • 26 mins - Good grief! It's a whole colony of ugly bastards!
  • 34 mins - No, don't have sex with her, no, no, no, no,no,nonononono...
  • 39 mins - Dude just picked his wedgie.
  • 44 mins - She's massaging his rib out?
  • 58 mins - Enough with the porn music, I'm sore...

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note bodymelt1.wav Shaan's boyfriend: "The first phase is hallucinogenic, the second phase is glandular, the third phase is arrrrgghhhh!"
Green Music Note bodymelt2.wav Pud: "How many kids in your family?"
Gino: "Italians mate, you know spermatossa el'grosso."
Green Music Note bodymelt3.wav Dr. Carrera: "Up until their birth, babies are the ultimate parasite."
Green Music Note bodymelt4.wav Dr. Carrera: "The human body, at best... ...a neglected engine running on cheap fuel."
Green Music NoteTheme Song Listen to a clip from the soundtrack.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipbodymelt1.mpg - 2.5m
Shaan's condition has become advanced; when the young Noble girl smacks her things take a turn for the worse. Okay, so Shaan's head collapses. That does not mean she is less attractive than before.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 2 [3] 4
Body Melt
Reply #17. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Wade
Classic low budget horror this one, up there with Jackson's Bad Taste & Brain Dead from accross the sea.

Harold Bishop swearing and waving a gun around is worth the price alone. (£3.99 from Play!!!)

Body Melt
Reply #18. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by lee
Its amazing that until now i had completely forgot about this film. As soon as i'd read the review i instantly tracked down a copy. 5 minutes into it and i could remmember it straight away. What an absolute classic this film is! It never takes itself seriously thus making the low budget easier to stomach. If you like your films gory as hell and fun to watch this needs to be at the top of your list! Get it now!
Body Melt
Reply #19. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Steve
I'm not a fan of human gore. I only like alien gore. I would never watch this movie ever.
Body Melt
Reply #20. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Inframan
Pretty good bad movie, not as good as Peter Jackson's earlier stuff. Not a classic or must see but worth a rental, they've got it a netflix.

I did like the guy's jogging outfit.
Re: Body Melt
Reply #21. Posted on January 29, 2007, 04:28:04 PM by macdude22
I saw this movie many moons ago as a small child, my parents owned a small shop in a small town that rented videos. This was one that was gotten from a distributor or something. I've never read much about it until now and our copy was lost sometime ago when the store was sold and the videos auctioned off. As far as bad movies go you can do a lot worse than Body Melt. Now if I can only find the other film I remember seeing. There was an old house or castle or something and some guy or family had this big thing come out of their mouth and I swear he tried to impregnate someone with it. But I can't be for sure.
Re: Body Melt
Reply #22. Posted on July 25, 2007, 10:08:00 AM by Dominomius
hey, when in this movie does a three-legged dog appear?
Re: Body Melt
Reply #23. Posted on February 13, 2008, 04:59:50 PM by Kruge
Heheh, I like the photo on the right side of the upper row - the guy with the opened chest.

I never knew that people had entrails all the way up to their necks in their body. Even where ribs should show this guy has a digestive tract...
Re: Body Melt
Reply #24. Posted on December 09, 2008, 07:35:36 PM by knightsaber1
I remember how excited I was when I saw an uncut reissue of this movie. I've roamed this site since its infancy, so I felt like I had found the Hope Diamond on the DVD shelf. Unfortunately, by the time I finally saw it I had become a stickler for things like plot holes big enough to fly an airbus through. Oh, and I agree that porn music is NOT appropriate for a scene with a guy sneezing himself to death in the sink.  Thumbdown
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