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DEATH RACE 2000 - 3 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1978 New World Pictures.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Frankenstein - David Carradine! Dark and brooding racer, he is believed to be a myriad of replaced limbs.
  • Machine Gun Joe - Sylvester Stallone! Racer with a classic gangster motif, except he stresses. A lot. Him and his ulcer say hi to a grenade.
  • Annie Paine - Daughter of the rebel leader who is out to capture or kill Frankenstein, she falls in love with him instead.
  • Myra - Joe's amazingly blonde navigator, helps him welcome the grenade.
  • Calamity Jane - Crazed female driver, her car looks like a steer until it runs over a land mine.
  • Matilda the Hun - Aryan poster girl, drives off a cliff.
  • Nero the Hero - Hits an explosive baby, points zero.
  • Junior Bruce - Hyper reporter, he won't stop campaigning for the race until Frankenstein runs him over.
  • Grace Parker - Heavy female reporter, she's the kind who is everybody's "dear friend."
  • Thomasina Paine - Leader of the resistance, Betsy Ross' daughter or something.
  • The President - Emperor of America who loves us all. Run down by Frankenstein.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

David Carradine running around in a leather jumpsuit, what else could you want? Well, maybe somebody other than David Carradine in the jumpsuit, but then Stallone wouldn't have anyone to stress about.

In 2000 America has been rebuilt by one man, the President has become an emperor. With this power he created the Race. Every year violent role-playing psychopaths are placed behind the wheels of high performance killing machines and sent across the country. Their goal? Finish alive with the most points from running down as many pedestrians as possible and it's all perfectly legal. See a line of doctors and nurses on the sidewalk? Thump, thump, thump: 110 points.

Lucky for us there are rebels who believe in safe highways; led by Thomasina Paine they decide to fight back. You have to feel sorry for Nero, he makes to run over what seems to be a cute little toddler and it turns out to be a doll full of explosives. The rebels really want to get Frankenstein though, he's favored to win the race and a personal friend of the President.

Having planted Annie as Frankenstein's navigator they try to capture or kill him to no avail; he is a man on a mission. His right hand was removed, in the real thing's place is an artificial one with a grenade embedded in it. (Believe it or not, Carradine makes the "hand grenade" joke - I didn't even get a chance.) Frankenstein hates the President and his race more than anyone else and he knows the winner gets to shake hands.

Okay, the entertainment value of this movie should be obvious. People are getting churned into road mush left and right with sports reporters acting like it's the Super Bowl.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • In the future marching bands suck.
  • David Carradine is a little skinny to be the imposing evil guy.
  • Every generation has one person who speaks like Howard Cosell.
  • Don't try to play matador with a car.
  • Blondes are not dumb; they are hard of hearing.
  • If you love someone set them free, if they come back turn them into road kill.
  • Stallone hates fly fishermen.
  • People do not make effective speed bumps.
  • David Carradine can kick Sylvester Stallone's ass.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 1 min - This title sequence does not bode well.
  • 7 mins - Yo Adrian! (You knew that was coming, your friends knew that was coming, the door knew that was coming...)
  • 25 mins - Pop goes the brain cavity!
  • 26 mins - Hey, how about sitting up? Thank you!
  • 26 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 37 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST CLERGY! Wait a minute, he just ran over the Pope!
  • 44 mins - "Make fast my V1 rocket?"
  • 52 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A VIOLIN!
  • 56 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 59 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A PIT CREW!
  • 76 mins - She's Batman! (Hehehehe!)

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note deathrace1.wav Junior: "Frankenstein, who lost a leg in 98, an arm in 99, with half a face and half a chest and all the guts in the world he's back! God only knows what he looks like under that mask, but he is back."
Green Music Note deathrace2.wav Junior: "Once again: Mr. President."
The President: "I have made the United Provinces of America the greatest power in the known universe."
Green Music Note deathrace3.wav Harold: "Which only goes to show that even the fearsome Frankenstein has a one hundred percent red-blooded American sense of humor."
Green Music Note deathrace4.wav Grace: "She was a great, dear friend of mine and I shall remember her forever howling down that freeway in the sky, knocking over...the angels."

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipdeathrace1.mpg - 3.0m
This takes some explaining and I'm not the man to do it, but here goes. Old people are worth mondo points, but the doctors and nurses are probably in their twenties or thirties and are worth much less as road kill (this all makes sense in a weird Kevorkian sort of way). By running over the individuals worth less points it shows Frankenstein has a sense of humor.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 5 6 [7] 8 9
Death Race 2000
Reply #49. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Alex Panz
THIS is, together with STARCRASH and THE HUMANOID, one of my favourites.
I love this move, but unfortunately the good DVD Version isn't available anymore here in Germany.

Anyway, this movie is a must see
Death Race 2000
Reply #50. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Max Power
Worse than "Gymkata", better than "The Thing With Two Heads."
Death Race 2000
Reply #51. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by WidgetHead
Absolutely hilarious movie.  I remember when the guy was going to run over the baby which was actually a bomb the guy who placed the bomb said, "Come to baby!".  I saw the movie about twenty-five years ago but I constantly think about that line of dialog.
Death Race 2000
Reply #52. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Garry K
Back in the 1970s, a co-worker saw DR2000 at the drive-in, told me to go see it, that I would love it, and he was right! Watching this movie gives one Walter Mitty-like thrills as we imagine we're the ones giving in to road rage and running over folks who get in our way!

I still use a lot of the lines when I'm out driving with friends who have also seen the movie. "Go for the baby! Go for the baby!" "Good-bye baby, hello 70 points!" "If you leave your navigator lying in the road, you gotta expect someone will run him over!"

And it was definitely Grace *Pander*, not Parker.
Death Race 2000
Reply #53. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Muffster
I was cruising the $1 VHS stacks at my favorite local used video game/dvd store and came upon this gem. I, like many of the other commenters, fondly remember being shooed from the room in the early dawn of cable television.

I tortured DH with it last night and am surprised that his being a B-movie afficianao, he wasn't really happy with it. I think reading the comments helps to put the movie into perspective.

The funny part is that they have been pushing the Kill Bill movies on cable lately, and Carradine is now stuck in my brain saying "Yellow Book DOT commmmmm". Anyone else smell a remake coming? Hey, Film Studio Executives, "REMAKE DEATH RACE 2000!!!"

Also, my copy did NOT have any full frontal Stallone shots. And weren't there some nuns that got it, too? Maybe that happened when I went to get another beer....
Death Race 2000
Reply #54. Posted on July 19, 2006, 04:54:19 AM by Don
Death Race 2000 is great fun, Roger Corman is a genius.  Why on earth would anyone being working on the roads or having roadside picnics while a hit-and-run death race is on?  Who cares?  But hold onto your hats... Corman has announced DEATH RACE 3000!!! Release date is in 2008
Re: Death Race 2000
Reply #55. Posted on December 30, 2007, 10:14:35 AM by Jeff
Dude, It's Cool
Re: Death Race 2000
Reply #56. Posted on January 27, 2008, 11:04:19 PM by Denver Prator
If you could pick "episodes" out of your life, that you could relive forever, I would say that this. Horrible, cheesy,moronic, WONDERFUL, movie was part of one of those episodes.

     Picture this, 1981, I had just had my 71 Dodge Charger r/t painted hemi-orange, that spring I graduated High School, 3-friends-2-sixpacks, and the Drive-inn, double feature, Star Crash, and Death race 2000. It was like I was living one of those 1980-ish "silly friends" movies, Ne- Ferris Buelhers day off. Sensless, pointless, waste of time, Magnificent! May all of you, have those episodess in your lives.
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