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GAMERA - 2 Slimes
Rated G
Copyright 1965 Daiei
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Gamera - A really fig bucking turtle which is annoyed after a nuclear blast wakes him up.
  • Toschio - Complete brat kid who loves turtles, if he was my kid I'd drown him in a well. (Named Kenny in the American version.)
  • Dr. Hidaka - Turtle researcher who gets in the limelight real quick when Gamera shows up.
  • Miss Sakurai - Hidaka's daughter, just here to give Aoyagi a girl to drool about. (Named Catherine in the American version.)
  • Aoyagi - Reporter who is smitten with Sakurai, he's also a pyromaniac. His day pretty much goes like this: take pictures, burn something, dream about Sakurai, drool, take pictures... (Named Alex in the American version.)
  • Professor Murase - Paleontologist and an expert on giant fire eating turtle legends.
  • Kyoke - Toschio's sister? Mother? I dunno. (Named Nora in the American version.)

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Godzilla's success spawned a horde of copycat monsters, but Gamera is a special case. He was just minding his own business, hibernating under the arctic ice sheet when some idiot drops an atom bomb on him. So he wakes up, looks around, and sees a Japanese research ship, at this point the grumpy terrapin conveys his displeasure by smashing the model boat.

Then Gamera goes looking for chow, he's a little hungry after sleeping for the last few millennium. So what does a fire breathing turtle eat? Fire... ...this is pretty much equivalent to you or me munching Chee-tos then projectile vomiting yellow mulch at people. It is unfortunate that Toschio does not have the stomach contents of a sixty meter turtle emptied on him, I HATE THIS KID. He spends the entire movie talking about loving turtles and Gamera especially, even climbs aboard a train to visit the monster. (Officials are feeding it tank cars full of oil.) For some unknown reason everybody in the film just thinks he's cute for doing all this, I'd be smacking the brat around. The amazing thing is that I'm certain we are supposed to feel for Toschio, he's the "cute little kid" we're all going to love. He's an annoying putz who probably gets beat up in school for the same (good) reason, thank you very much.

The film was shot in black and white, probably to save costs, but the format makes the arctic scenes look very cool and detached. I found myself wishing for a narrator to describe the ecosystem of the frozen land, plus his reaction at a huge turtle would have been priceless. "The seals move from breathing hole to breathing hole, hoping that a hungry polar bear is not... ...WHAT THE HECK IS THAT?"

Gamera as a monster is okay, what sort of entertainment value do you want out of a huge, flying, fire breathing, and fire eating turtle? You're watching for all the neat reactions from the actors of course. Case in point of the American actors, my high school drama teacher wouldn't have let them in the school play. It's hard to believe English was their first language, it's one thing to have some problems speaking a foreign language, but quite another to stutter in the same tongue you use every day. Plus the "General" who was obviously reading his lines directly off the "radio dispatch" he was just handed. (Watch the eyes move left to right as he says his lines. Oh the horror, the horror.)

Special Note: Unable to destroy Gamera Earth's scientists implement the "Z" Plan and launch him into orbit around Mars (or at Mars, needless to say the red planet is getting one unhappy camper) on a huge rocket. I was mildly amused by the idea that some alien civilization might someday be following the instructions of Voyager to contact us and find Gamera first. I am pretty sure they'd be less than amused with that Easter Egg.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Jet aircraft have a mute button to run silent and carry rear firing missiles.
  • Nuclear blasts don't melt ice.
  • Actors that can't make it in America go over to Japan. (Where they still probably starve or work at McDonalds.)
  • Prehistoric turtles were tough hombres.
  • Large buildings are built using chicken wire and plaster.
  • Gamera loves to go sightseeing.
  • A single sixty meter turtle (about two thirds of a football field mind you) can change the tides.
  • It is possible to lay a perfectly straight oil slick across miles of open ocean.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 2 mins - I know this is just the opening credits, but I'm getting seasick.
  • 5 mins - Is English your second language? No wonder you couldn't get a job in Hollywood! Go flip burgers, you freak.
  • 13 mins - You just read your lines off that sheet of paper didn't you? My God, you suck.
  • 17 mins - AWFUL DUBBING.
  • 37 mins - No, I think that he means it can just about freeze anything... (Go watch the scene.)
  • 42 mins - You must be kidding me, he shoots flames out of his shell and flies?
  • 54 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST AN AIRPORT!
  • 58 mins - Hey brat, he's stomping a serious hole in Tokyo, what exactly is your definition of being bad?
  • 79 mins - That is one big rocket, if Gamera is sixty meters tall, it's about...six hundred meters, I guess.

Quotes: 

  • Aoyagi: "The Third World War might begin any minute and we'll all be killed, why should we bother about giant turtles?"
    Dr. Hidaka: "Yes, maybe you're right."
  • Policeman: "You hear that, it's Gamera! Hurry, hurry, everybody run! Don't you want to live, get moving!"
    Teenager: "Ah cool it will yah, Gamera doesn't scare us."

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note gamera1.wav American General: "Have you spotted anything on your radar screen?"
American Radar Guy: "No sir, it must be coated with anti-electric wavepaint sir."
American General: "Okay."
Green Music Note gamera2.wav Professor Murase: "Our ancient legends did mention fire eating turtles..."
Green Music Note gamera3.wav Toschio: "Sir thanks a lot, Gamera saved my life for me once, Gamera's really a nice turtle."
Green Music Note gamera4.wav Gamera roaring.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

ImageImageImage
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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipgamera1.mpg - 2.2m
Gamera wades through the city, dispensing painful death to anyone unlucky enough to be in his path. People being burned are surprisingly orderly about it, they just lay down en masse.

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Internet Movie Database


Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 [2] 3
Gamera
Reply #9. Posted on November 26, 2002, 08:12:48 PM by tyler
This Movie is The Best Gamera Film I Have Seen.Good Special fx and plot.I sugjest you buy or rent this film.Go to ebay to buy, because it is out of print.
Gamera
Reply #10. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Wonko the Sane
Fitfully, this was the first Gamera film I ever saw.  Though Godzilla will always be my favorite giant monster, I think Gamera is more than just a clone.  A flying, fire eating/regurgitating, fanged, turtle, from outer space!  How beautiful is that?

I really need to get ahold of those three most recent Gamera films made by the director of "Godzilla: Final Wars".

Gamera
Reply #11. Posted on June 12, 2003, 12:09:53 PM by
That was one of the best crowd panic scene I have ever seen.  I enjoyed watching Gamera burn all the people to death.  They were so orderly when they were running away from him.  I find the people there to be very attractive.  They were all holding each other to dear life and they were embracing each other in a rather sexual way.  I wonder if the people there put powder or perfume.
Gamera
Reply #12. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Nene Murakami
Gamera is a very interesting movie to watch.  The special effects in the 1960's may be primitive in todays standards but the main point in appreciating this movies is by using your imagination.  I may sound spaced out but hey this movie was released in the 1960's.
Gamera
Reply #13. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Dr. Serizawa
Dear god, you're all missing the point. The Japanese portions of the movie are unwatchable to anyone with two brain cells to slam against each other - it's the hysterical American bits that make this worth 90 minutes of your precious life!

SEE: 2 idiots "debating" on a setless stage, finally degenerating into namecalling.

SEE: One over-the-hill drunken stublebum of an actor slur his lines and stare unfocusedly into space

SEE: the swishiest Air Force noncom ever to sashay around a set ("Clark", in the opening scenes)

Get this DVD before it disappears for good.
Gamera
Reply #14. Posted on November 06, 2003, 01:38:53 PM by tyler
Watch for the new gamera movies on DVD!They have released GAMMERA:THE INVINCIBLE,WAR OF THE MONSTERS,(GAMERA V.S BARUGON)and DESTROY ALL PLANETS!(GAMERA V.S VIRAS)But watch for ATTACK OF THE MONSTERS,(GAMERA V.S GUIRON).Rumer has it that they might relaese RETURN OF THE GIANT MONSTERS!(GAMERA V.S GYOS).
Gamera
Reply #15. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM by doug Govostis
Image entertainment will be releasing Gamera vs. Monster X and Monster from a Prehistoric planet on Double bill DVD.
It should be out January 20, 2004.  FINALLY!!!
Gamera
Reply #16. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Doug Govostis
Return of the Giant Monsters is being worked out with the people at Retromedia and made a possibity into an almost definite.  Monster X is confirmed.  Let's see Gamera Super Monster released.
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