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KRULL - 3 Slimes
Rated PG
Copyright 1983 Barclays Mercantile Industrial Finance Limited
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Colwyn - Heroic prince who wishes to free his world from the evil Beast. He is also made out of something fire retardant.
  • Lyssa - Princess who dearly loves Colwyn, even though she has known him for about one hour and it is an arranged marriage.
  • Ergo - Inept sorcerer who has some ego problems.
  • Ynyr - Ancient wise man with darn little common sense. Dies after he runs out of sand. (Go watch the movie and stop scratching your head over what that means.)
  • Torquil - Bandit and robber, he does not really exhibit any good qualities, but Colwyn likes him for some reason.
  • The Cyclops - Powerful warrior who can see into the future, unfortunately the only thing he can see is his own death. Ends up as a one eyed pancake.
  • Kegan - Liam Neeson! One of Torquil's fellow bandits who has a wife in almost every village. Shot by a Slayer.
  • The Widow of the Web - Once beloved of Ynyr, she has been sentenced to life imprisonment for killing his son. Eaten by a giant spider.
  • Turold - Colwyn's father, the late king.
  • Eirig - Lyssa's father, another late king. (In case you missed it, I'm not talking about punctuality.)
  • Rhun and the Merry Men - The rest of the bandits, just here so someone can die every other scene or so.
  • The Emerald Seer and Titch - Old man and his little apprentice, the seer is killed and replaced by a servant to the Beast.
  • The Slayers - Army of armored creatures which serve the Beast. When you kill one red special effects go off and it's skull splits open, then something nasty burrows into the ground.
  • The Beast - Conqueror of worlds, ruler of the known galaxy, but I've seen piles of sticks with better skill at romance. Roasted alive by Colwyn.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

If you were any sort of fantasy film lover alive during the 80's it is impossible to imagine that "Krull" did not grab your attention at the video store. Not only does it have an impressive cast (so many of these people appeared in other films, though I only mentioned Liam with the "!"), there are swords, lasers, monsters, and even a remote control 10,000rpm throwing star! Coolness!

Along the lines of plot, well the film is a textbook example of some evil power stealing the hero's true love and him fighting to gain her back, with some sidetracks to show just how fantastic the setting is. Even though the Beast is a towering reptile monster it desires Lyssa to be his bride, she is a little unnerved by this. (Not the least of which would be consummating the event, yikes!) Slayers take her prisoner and leave Colwyn for dead, but the prince is saved by a wise old man and easily gathers a party of loyal friends to assist him in attacking an impregnable fortress.

The special effects range from downright ludicrous, such as the amazing flying Clydesdales scene, to exceptional. The stop motion spider that guards the Widow is a gorgeous piece of work. There is nothing like watching a convincing arachnid scaled to the size of a small house. Most of the acting I can do without, but Ergo was my favorite character. When not bumbling spells and turning himself into a goose, the little guy is extolling his own virtues, which leads to some amusing descriptive phrases.

No matter what "real" critics say, you can not get me to hate this film.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Women can make water catch on fire.
  • Advanced alien armies, which have conquered the known galaxy, use horses for land transportation.
  • Heroes are made from asbestos.
  • When traveling as a flaming meteorite one should avoid ponds or other bodies of water.
  • Kings carry master keys to every lock in their kingdom. (Which probably work on chastity belts too.)
  • Spider web sounds just like wind chimes when you shake it.
  • Beauty might not be skin deep, but love sure the heck is.
  • Cyclops are made out of Kevlar.
  • Boomerang throwing stars, that you intend on chucking at some slimy alien overlord, should have a nonstick coating.
  • Marriage vows are based on a grisly way to flame broil the bride and groom's enemies.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 10 mins - Advanced enough to have propane torches, but still using bows and swords...
  • 16 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A HAY CART!
  • 22 mins - Colwyn is really spry for having a laser lance pierce his shoulder. Oh, rock climbing now!
  • 54 mins - Great idea Beast, keep traumatizing her with weird visions, I can see this being a successful marriage.
  • 56 mins - Hehehe! He actually stood up in the quicksand for a moment.
  • 58 mins - Everyone is darn clean after wading through all that quicksand.
  • 74 mins - The phrase you are looking for is "Oh shit!" What did you expect was living in that huge web anyway?
  • 84 mins - Why didn't you get a weekly schedule or something? That way they would know when the fortress was visiting some local area.
  • 91 mins - Holy blue screen Batman!

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note krull1.wav Ynyr: "This it was given me to know, that many worlds have been enslaved by the Beast and his army, the Slayers."
Green Music Note krull2.wav Ergo: "I am Ergo the Magnificent! Short in stature, tall in power, narrow of purpose, and wide of vision, and I do not travel with peasants and beggars. Good bye!"
Green Music Note krull3.wav Torquil: "I don't kill men without good reason."
Green Music Note krull4.wav Ergo: "My name is no jest, beanpole. It's all very well to have a short name when you're twenty feet tall, but small people need large names to give them weight."

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipkrull1.mpg - 2.3m
Colwyn vs. the Beast.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 5 6 [7] 8
Re: Krull
Reply #49. Posted on July 17, 2008, 11:10:43 PM by The Slayer
Come my children, seek the Slayer's wisdom at http://www.asktheslayer.therudenews.com/

Re: Krull
Reply #50. Posted on November 01, 2008, 04:45:57 PM by Feisty Cadaver
Even after all these years, the princess is still hot!
Re: Krull
Reply #51. Posted on November 09, 2008, 12:57:58 AM by Alec
 hot Just watched this on TV what 25 YEARS after my mum took me to see it at the ABC cinema in Harrow!

I loved this film so much when I was a kid, I made up a game we used to play at breaktime called "Slayers" - basically it involved running around the playground at high speed and then fencing against your foe with one arm, aiming to score a hit and thereby win. Don't know what I was smoking but watching the movie brought back happy memories.

Watching as an adult, it's notable how BLEAK and NIHILISTIC the film is, as the hero's loyal companions get mown down in tragic and meaningless ways throughout - e.g. the guy who gets staked in that trap-room when he's just reaching for his dagger, or the guy who drowns in the quicksand, and obviously the cyclops who dies in the most horrendous and bloody awful way without remark!  Bluesad

The other thing that struck me is when the fire manes fly across the ravine near the end of the movie, it reminds me very much of Sigur Ros' Glosoli music video - I wonder if Krull was the influence for this beautiful scene?!
Re: Krull
Reply #52. Posted on January 16, 2009, 06:38:11 PM by Wanderer
Love that review. This is oddly one of my favorite films. I knew all the lines in this movie at one time. Had my first born been a son his name was going to be Kegen Alexander.
Re: Krull
Reply #53. Posted on April 22, 2009, 11:33:24 AM by Jennifer
I enjoyed this movie when I was a kid.  I am sorta a sci-fi geek anyway.  I love watching the old style animation.  It's a bit cheesy but in 1983 I thought it was awesome!  I watched it with my kids the other night and they really enjoyed it.  My favorite part is when the slayers rise out of the water.  It is so freaky.  This movie has so many great actors in it and I think that is worth a look.  Liam Neeson is so amazing.  Anyway, this movie makes me feel young again.
Re: Krull
Reply #54. Posted on September 17, 2009, 08:16:23 PM by Mister Gone
Sure it has Liam Neeson in it but no one recognized a young Robbie "Hagrid" Coletrain? He was the fat bandit! It's so great!
Re: Krull
Reply #55. Posted on May 06, 2010, 07:41:25 PM by Jill
 Twirling I love this movie, my mom and I watched it when I was about 10 and now I want my 10 year old to see it.  I can't wait till it comes on tv I may just have to go rent it or buy it if I can find it. My favorite part is the flying clysdales with the flamming hooves. LOVE IT! hot
Re: Krull
Reply #56. Posted on August 30, 2010, 12:42:58 PM by Chad
I didn't much care for Krull. It has the makings of a great camp classic, but I at least need an explanation for the happenings of the film to enjoy it. I ended up ranting about it to my parents for hours to the effect of...

"Where did the aliens come from?!"
"Why are there aliens in a fantasy film in the first place?!"
"Why are the families fighting each other when they should be fighting the aliens?!"
"Why is The Glave such a important symbol?!"
"Why does The Beast absolutely need to bang Colwyn's fiance?!"
"If the Firemares are supposed to be so damn fast, how are they so easily captured?!"
"Why does The Glave let Colwyn use the force to guide it?!"
"Since when was Colwyn a Firebender?!"
"How did everyone get back home if The Black Fortress is constantly teleporting?!"
"Why does this movie make less sense than the backstory of 'Highlander 2: The Quickening'?!"

I felt like Jim Carrey at the end of Batman Forever ("Too many questions... Too many questions...").

Bare in mind that I love bad movies (Yor, Forbidden Zone, and Rocky Horror top the list). I just want a little explanation. And if you don't explain it, you had better keep me placated enough so I don't start questioning it.
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