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MALEORVS - Skull
Not Rated
Copyright 1990 Gore Galore Productions Ltd.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • James - James. Quasi leader of the group, he spends half the movie tripping over his lines. Splattered by Maleorvs.
  • Dave - Scott, a conservative who finds people melting very amusing. Choked by Maleorvs.
  • Eric - A.J. Young lad who studies occult books. Taken over by Maleorvs.
  • Daniel - D.R. Sort of a quiet guy who wears an Indiana Jones hat. Mashed by Maleorvs.
  • Kevin - Gary. Nerdy virgin, melted into jello.
  • James' Mom - Gary's mom. Lady who isn't used to finding melted kids in her kitchen.
  • Inbred Woodsman - Jason. I think that description should suffice. Dead meat.
  • Maleorvs - A powerful Greek demon thing.


The Plot: 

Almost ten years ago some of the people I know from high school made this mess for a Latin class project. I've been trying to figure out the connection ever since, so far I've come up with this: Maleorvs has a "V" instead of a "U" in it. (Tick tock, tick tock...) Anyway, a group of friends who often play Dungeons and Dragons is confronted with an ancient evil when Eric discovers the key to freeing Maleorvs. Soon the young man is half possessed by the demon and committing heinous acts to feed it's hunger. After suddenly melting Kevin it forces him to run off into the woods. The remainder of the group wastes little time in trying to track down the monster, even enlisting the help of some moonshine crazy woodsman. Let's get this over with quickly huh? They corner Eric in a church basement where he strips off his shirt and kills them, the end. You never quite look at someone the same after seeing a piece of work like this. Gary did most of the editing and such using two VCRs mind you, it makes 1970s kung fu flicks look like IMAX.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • If you're going to loop footage of a fire make the loop longer than six seconds.
  • Flea markets stock ancient Greek tomes.
  • The Greeks might have spoken Latin, but they wrote in English.
  • At my ten year high school reunion there probably won't be any successful actors.
  • When somebody is going to pick a human sacrifice at random don't be the guy wearing an "Oh no, Mr Bill!" shirt.
  • Sneaking up on someone through dry leaves is easy.
  • You can read a book without a flashlight in the woods at night.
  • Evil Greek demons like to pray in Christian churches.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 3 mins - Good grief, everybody looks so young...
  • 7 mins - Those sweeping sounds don't quite match the action.
  • 10 mins - Watching as a fishing line pulls the book open...
  • 14 mins - Is he laughing?
  • 14 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A VIRGIN! (It's Gary, he's 16. Yes, I'm sure.)
  • 23 mins - Eric is gripping the foam rock a little too tight.
  • 30 mins - That is obviously a toy cap pistol.
  • 37 mins - The worst fight scene ever portrayed for a high school Latin project.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note maleorvs1.wav Narrator: "Just after the Golden Age of Man, Zeus, in his search for the next form man was to take, created a creature of such power that even the mighty gods were confounded in their efforts to control it."
Green Music Note maleorvs2.wav Dave: "Eric I told you those books work, they're real! It might not be a good idea to use words from them. We don't even know what they say, for all we know you could be reading Latin insults about our mothers."
Green Music Note maleorvs3.wav Dave: "It looks evil."
James: "Yeah, no kidding."
Green Music Note maleorvs4.wav James: "Face it David! Eric is dead and something evil has taken over his body. If you can't find out with ah, er, better idea then leave!"

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipmaleorvs1.mpg - 1.9m
Kevin melts as a result of Eric's unholy spell. Everyone else in the scene is suppressing laughter, that would be on account of the whole thing being darn goofy.

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ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

Lesson Learned:
  • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

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