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MOSQUITO - 3 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1994 Skeeters Limited Partnership
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Parks - Scientist who works for the Air Force, his entire job is gathering meteorites.
  • Meg - Petite (Biology?) student who is eager to be a park ranger. Considering she can't recognize a sixty pound mosquito, the future is dim.
  • Ray - Meg's studmuffin, he spends most of his free time threatening Earl.
  • Earl - Gunnar Hansen! A violent bank robber who suddenly is born again and just wants to save humanity, ends up about three feet from a gas main explosion.
  • Hendricks - Annoying and goofy park ranger, presumed very dead.
  • Junior - Slow witted kin to Earl, he goes back for the bag of cash and becomes a tasty snack.
  • Rex - Extremely slow witted (Worse than Junior!) cousin to Earl and Rex, shot by accident.
  • A whole lot of campers, fishermen, and park rangers - Poor prospects for the next Red Cross Blood Drive.
  • The Mosquitos - Giant versions of the common pest, I'm talking Saint Bernard with wings here, mutated after drinking alien blood.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Here is one of those films that I first caught at around 0100 on USA, it stayed with me and you can imagine the joy when a DVD release was announced. Despite having some sections with truly awful effects, whenever a number of mosquitos are flying it reverts to animation reminiscent of "Creepshow," the monsters themselves are fine looking constructs and explode in a satisfying shower of sparks (I dunno why sparks either, but it's amusing.) and goo when blasted. The film begins with an alien spacecraft buzzing Earth, after dispatching a smaller ship it blasts off. Meanwhile the shuttle or landing craft takes a wrong turn at the stratosphere and crashes into a swamp. It's pilot only manages to open the hatch and dangle one arm out before expiring. (Considering alien's manifest problems in exiting their craft you'd expect some design changes.) Hungry mosquitos soon cluster on the exposed visitor's skin and feast on the mutagenic fluids... ...which returns us to the park, where Ray and Meg's vehicle collides with one of the huge insects. Both hop out and look dumbly at it, "Huh, must be a bird or something." Excuse me? A bird? This provides a convenient reason for them to meet Parks, then Hendricks, then Earl and Junior. Those last two don't fit in very well at first, but when you're boarded up in a house under siege by giant mosquitos it's nice to have Gunner Hansen on chainsaw. Junior doesn't stay around very long thank goodness, hopefully he didn't leave any kids behind to pollute the gene pool either. Now there's a horror story, the progeny of Junior and his unwashed, snaggle toothed, wife (1st cousins.) plague West Virginia...

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Aliens are behind humans in the field of insect repellent technology.
  • Girls only play volleyball in bikinis.
  • Pesticide does not make a hotdog taste better.
  • Huge mosquitos are hell on ceiling fans.
  • Before discarding the dead guy you might want to check his pants for keys to the RV.
  • On a deserted country road, in the middle of the night, never, ever, ever stop for the lunatic wearing camouflage pants.
  • It's difficult to drive with sixty pound bugs hitting the windshield.
  • Having your guts sucked out will turn your eyes into ping pong balls and make them pop out of your skull.
  • Sweaty clothing is easily set on fire with a lighter.
  • One can not expect to repair a modern geiger counter using only a flathead screwdriver. What you can do is convert it into a timed detonator.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 1 min - An alien spacecraft. Never a good thing for us Earthlings...
  • 5 mins - Um, that's the largest insect since the Cretaceous Mrs. Biologist.
  • 15 mins - Exactly who built the outhouse there? Let's see, "I'm miles from anywhere, it's a meadow on the edge of deep forest, I think I'll build an outhouse..." ...yeah, that's what happened.
  • 23 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 25 mins - The mosquito is stabbing her butt! Hehehe!
  • 43 mins - Special effects!
  • 57 mins - Did you guys soak your clothes in kerosene or something?
  • 62 mins - Hey Meg, is it cold out here?
  • 67 mins - Gunnar has a chainsaw, something is going to die.
  • 84 mins - Say, doesn't that fridge look cozy?

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note mosquito1.wav Meg: "I don't think this is a bird, Ray. It looks more like...some kind of bug!"
Green Music Note mosquito2.wav Parks: "This is unbelievable."
Ray: "No it's not Doc, it's aliens and they're everywhere and that guy's obviously been zapped."
Meg: "Ray, this is serious."
Ray: "I am serious..."
Green Music Note mosquito3.wav Hendricks: "Well ugly, it looks like those mosquitos got themselves some dinner."
Junior: "Hey man, you can't just leave us here with those things. They got my cousin, they nearly got me!"
Hendricks: "Shut up!"
Green Music Note mosquito4.wav Parks: "Yeah, it's just as I suspected, those mosquitos are making these bodies radioactive!"

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipmosquito1.mpg - 2.8m
I guess we can all agree that having Junior's eyeballs pop out of his head when the mosquito starts siphoning off his vital fluids is pretty B, but that's what you are here for isn't it? Isn't it?

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Internet Movie Database


Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 2 3 [4]
Re: Mosquito
Reply #25. Posted on April 27, 2008, 07:14:45 PM by Slim Jim
Okay - I've never heard of this movie before, at all.  I happened to catch it two weeks ago on the Sci-Fi channel.  The only reason I continued to watch it was because of Rachel Loiselle (Meg).  I am a sucker for redheads with white skin and every time she was on camera my heart-a-fluttered.  Man, I googled her and hardly anything shows up for this gorgeous actress.  Apparently this is the only film she's ever been in.  Rats!

When Gunnar Hansen showed up in the movie, I knew he looked familiar but until he held up that chainsaw near the end I didn't make the connection.  Yeah - I'm a bit slow. 

This movie is the perfect entertainment for a lazy Saturday afternoon.  It's not a great film, but it's not that bad either.  I want to procure it on DVD - if I can find it - so I can watch the edited parts and to do some freeze-frames on Ms. Loiselle.  I think for those true horror fans, or bug movies fans, this is a must for their video library. 
Re: Mosquito
Reply #26. Posted on September 24, 2009, 04:49:52 PM by devbob
I can't believe nobody mentioned the deputy with the disappearing beard.  It's there in one scene and gone in the next.  Also, mosquitoes don't hatch from eggs, there's a larval stage, but I guess they couldn't be bothered to show that.
Re: Mosquito
Reply #27. Posted on January 03, 2010, 04:31:31 AM by Thomas
I have wanted to see this movie for the last 15 years!

I saw a quick clip of it on a movie show that used to be on in the 90s that my sister and I watched. All I remember was a big mosquito and someone blasts it with a shotgun. That was enough to get me to want to see this.

I finally decided to look up 'mosquito movies'. Good ol' internet.

Thanks for having this little review of it. Now I have to find this movie and watch it...
Re: Mosquito
Reply #28. Posted on May 23, 2012, 07:42:07 AM by Ramadwarf
MOSQUITO! When I was eight this came on the telly and my Dad was taping it for me until he saw how gory it was. He proceeded to tape over it with GORGO that same night (no complaints) but for the last twelve years I've been desperate to see Mosquito. I could never find it on DVD (apart from a copy there is on Amazon which is about ninety odd quid or something) and didn't want to find it on the internet because I only watch films at the Cinema or on DVD.

 But then I found out about 'ioffer', a place where you can get ANYthing. 'Moontrap', 'The Rift', 'The Boogens', 'The Keep', 'Without Warning', 'Watchers 1, 2 & 3', 'The Uninvited' (you know, the only with George Kennedy and the killer mutant cat on the cruise ship), 'Imp' (a completely forgotten Gremlins rip-off, my favourite films!) AND 'MOSQUITO', the film I'd waited for, searched for and CRAVED.

 I think I could easily have been disappointed with this film because of how I'd obviously been building it up in my head over the years. But let me tell you, I wasn't! I was hooked from the beginning, the effects range from fantastic to terrible, the acting isn't Olivier standard but the film isn't Richard III; it's obviously a b-movie and it loves it so I don't understand why this isn't down as one of the better mutant bug films. I think the most likely reason is the humour. It's clearly a comedy horror from about five minutes in, and maybe the kind of bad acting in this film lends itself more to a film that's trying to be serious when in actual fact it's really bad. So the mixture doesn't work. But watch it, and if you want to buy it, go on ioffer and see if they've any copies left.  Smile
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FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

Lesson Learned:
  • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

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