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NOSFERATU: THE FIRST VAMPIRE - 3 Slimes
Not Rated
Copyright 1922. This version, copyright 1998 Arrow Entertainment
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Thomas Hutter - Motivated young broker, he intends to make his fortune selling a mansion to Count Orlok.
  • Ellen Hutter - Thomas' wife, her facial expressions did make me giggle at times, especially right before she dies.
  • Knock - Bushy eyebrows extraordinaire! Slightly mad broker who falls under the vampire's spell.
  • The Westrenkas - Thomas' friends who probably wish they hadn't taken in his strange wife while he's away.
  • Professor Bulwer - Not only does this guy sleep a lot, he sees vampires everywhere. If it eats something, it's a vampire to him.
  • Captain and First Mate of the Demeter - Doomed soon as Orlok's coffin is loaded aboard, the skipper is drained of his blood while the latter jumps overboard. (Arrgghh, he'll feed da fishes...)
  • Count Orlok - Nosferatu himself, a hideous monster who could stand to wear braces for a few hundred years. That and a manicure. Destroyed by the rising sun.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

The legendary vampire film, over three quarters of a century old and still worth watching. Say that about yourself when seventy-seven you are, as Yoda would put it. It's also hosted by David Carradine, he provides a short opening piece which seems blue screened for some reason.

For those of you who were raised by wolves and haven't seen this film before, the plot follows. Knock receives a letter from Orlok. The Count wishes to buy a home in Bremen, he quickly dispatches his assistant Hutter with the necessary contracts. Thomas arrives in Transylvannia to find the Count is a frightening visage, though he first chalks up the strange happenings as bad dreams. Too late he realizes that Orlok is a vampire and the monster wants Ellen (after seeing her picture in a locket).

The vampire's earth filled coffins are loaded on the ship Demeter; en route across the seas crew die one by one as he drains their life. Meanwhile, Thomas struggles to reach Ellen by land, arriving after the crewless Demeter docks. With Nosferatu's coming a plague falls upon the city, it is only when Ellen sacrifices herself that evil is banished.

This version is remastered and includes the most enjoyable soundtrack I've seen it put to yet. Type O Negative's metal/gothic songs rarely seem out of place and then only for moments. The film itself is a masterpiece, with a tidy plot and excellent makeup for Nosferatu.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • David Carradine is starting to show his age.
  • People once used giant socks as luggage.
  • Transylvannia is inhabited by tiger-dogs.
  • Cabbies have always been bad drivers.
  • Never cut yourself in front of a vampire.
  • Venus flytraps drink blood.
  • 17th century sailing ship's equivalent of autopilot was tying someone to the wheel.
  • The emergency broadcast system has come a long way.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 2 mins - Blue screening anyone?
  • 6 mins - Bad edit, one minute she's running at him, the next she's standing still.
  • 12 mins - Now that's a weird dog.
  • 14 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A BOOK!
  • 28 mins - Make sure you're listening to the song here. I'm never having sex again...
  • 46 mins - Hehehe! Vampire hobo!
  • 55 mins - Interesting time to mention a male rooster.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note nosferatu1.wav Song from the opening scenes.
Green Music Note nosferatu2.wav Song from when Thomas first meets the count.
Green Music Note nosferatu3.wav Song from Ellen's death.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipnosferatu1.mpg - 2.6m
The first mate tries to hack open Orlok's coffin.

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FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

Lesson Learned:
  • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

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