|Copyright 1972 Aquarius Releasing Inc.
| Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
- Lynn - Female nutcase who escaped from an asylum.
- Zambrini - Owns a diner in Hooterville, feeds dead bodies to his pigs. Stabbed by Lynn and then chopped up into bite sized pieces for the piggies.
- Dan - Sheriff, this guy needed to get a clue.
- Ben - Oil field worker who gets too pushy with Lynn, now a major component of bacon.
- Mrs. Macy - Neighbor to Zambrini who sounds like a loony old woman, knows that he is feeding bodies to the pigs.
- Jess - Bounty hunter for the hospital where Lynn was institutionalized, stabbed by her and turned into pig chow.
- The Pigs - Hungry little porkers who survive on a diet of bad actors.
|For nearly two hours I tried to claw my eyes out, this was... ...PAINFUL. I mean, talking about it helps some, but you just can't understand how bad this was. Quite possibly the worst movie reviewed to date, I'd have to watch The Cars That Ate Paris and this in a row to really judge. NO DAMN WAY, DON'T EVEN SUGGEST IT. Lynn is a serious nut case who stabbed her father to death after he raped her, freak woman believes daddy is still alive. "Lithium Poster Girl" escapes from the asylum when the nurse and doctor turn their backs to um, study anatomy. Stealing a car she flees into backwoods America, ending up at Zambrini's roadside diner. Here's another well adjusted human being, he is the proud owner of a flock of human eating pigs. Seems the little oinkers broke loose one time and devoured a drunk passed out in the field, now they crave human flesh. So Zambrini has been digging up graves, stealing corpses from the morgue, and probably killing travelers to keep them fed. Soon after psycho girl arrives she kills Ben - more food for the pigs. Then Jess shows up to take her back to the asylum - again with the pig chow. Zambrini figures out he has a bigger nut on his hands than himself at this point, makes the mistake of pointing out her dad is dead too. Lynn kills him and guess what she does with the body? That's right, slops the pigs and throws her necklace in the pen. The Sheriff falls for the ruse of course, he's dumb as a stump anyway, he would have believed a note left behind which said, "Fed myself to pigs, goodbye cruel world - Lynn." Nobody in the whole film can act, it's awful. I'm hoping these people stayed starving artists and subsequently, well starved. (You watch it and get high and mighty.) Most of the time it's too dark to see what is going on, that's not so bad, but the song! The wretched song we hear over and over signifying Lynn's dementia. I cried for about an hour after watching this film, not proud about it either. |
|Things I Learned From This Movie:|| |
- Pigs are winos natural predators.
- There isn't a law against feeding dead people to pigs.
- Nutcases constantly hear a voice singing, "La-la-la" in their head.
- If dad can't come to the phone because he's dead try calling later.
- The Egyptians worshipped pigs as gods.
- Asylums hire bounty hunters.
- Crazy women use lipstick as war paint.
- Blood looks remarkably like tomato paste.
- 1 min - What the HECK is going on?
- 12 mins - Focus would be good here.
- 22 mins - Is anybody normal in this movie?
- 28 mins - You stabbed daddy to death, friggin psycho...
- 43 mins - By now it's perfectly clear she is bonkers.
- 47 mins - Nobody notices the severed hand laying out?
- 74 mins - We knew she was a mental case over half an hour ago. Arrggghhh!
- Ending Credits - No director or copyright info, amazing. That makes it much harder to track down and punish these people.
| ||Audio clips in wav format||SOUNDS||Starving actors speak out|| |
||Zambrini: "You see they got used to eating human flesh."
||Mrs. Macy: "He feeds those pigs dead people and then he eats the pigs."
||Zambrini: "So what? Everybody's sick, everybody's running away from everything. What are you, what are you a troublemaker, huh?"
|Theme Song|| Listen to a clip from the soundtrack. |
| ||Click for a larger image||IMAGES||Scenes from the movie|| |
| ||Watch a scene||VIDEO||MPEG video files|| |
|Who thought this scene up? Arrggghh!|
In retrospect, this is an accurate portrayal of the nightmares I had for weeks after watching this. Perhaps the screenwriter was dabbling in a bit of foreshadowing.
| ||Leave a comment||EXTRAS||Buy the movie|| |
Reply #9. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Sebastian
"Pigs" is a brilliant low-budget movie. It makes use of the simplest elements and succeeds in surpassing its limitation by leaps and bounds. How sad that so many narrow-minded people would trash simply because they saw no "gore."
When you hold a film to such shallow standards without even the simplest attempt at appreciating it, it's truly a tragedy.
Back to ignorant bashing we go.
Reply #10. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Sebastian
I should also add that the sing-song nursery rhyme repeated throughout the film is an excellent dramatic device. The review is extremely shortened and highly misleading. It makes the movie sound as deep as a 90s teen horror Wes Craven flick.
As far as the actors ending up as starving artists, Marc Lawrence has starred in countless gangster roles throughout the years and is a very well known, accomplished actor.
A bit of clarification which seems to have completely escaped every one: the jumpy dialogue, dream sequences, and *everything* else about the movie which everyone is so conviently ridiculing are all done intentionally: they are the very things which create the nightmarish feel of the picture -- and no, not because they're "bad," as if that wasn't obviously enough a cheapshot.
Reply #11. Posted on July 10, 2000, 11:12:23 PM by goldschilling
"Somebody's waiting for you, somewhere down the road!"
I can't believe noone has mentioned the catchy theme song during the credits. This is by far the worst movie I've ever seen and I know my friends agree. I now eat pork, ham, bacon and other pig products as much as possible just so that I can feel like I am evening the score. Not only has it not erased the painful memory of this movie, I now have high blood pressure and will probably die within the next 6 months. Thank you, PIGS, for ending my life. At least I won't have any more nightmares of being trapped in a pig pen while a crazy, old farmer tells me I'm a troublemaker.
Reply #12. Posted on August 23, 2000, 09:24:58 PM by dustin(horror fan,you get the point!)
i rented this movie and i should have heeded your warning but this movie does deserve 1 slime atleast and even i can get more real blood then that i just couldnt stop sayin "Why the hell was this film made?!!!"oh my god the acting is cheesy the special effects are crap and i had to fastforward almost half way through the stupid movie!veiwers or badmovie fans dont take this movie out of your local video store it aint worth 5 cents!!!!aaaaaaaaarrgh!!!!
Reply #13. Posted on February 16, 2001, 02:40:32 PM by popeyed
I knew Mark Lawrence is a great character actor. But now I know he also is a great director!
Reply #14. Posted on April 29, 2001, 11:47:37 PM by Josh
Shew...This is bad. I lived through it somehow. By the end of the movie my mind was so blank I had no idea what was going on.
Reply #15. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by lostmissy
I couldn't watch this entire movie . I got it at a yard sale for a buck and actually threw it away half way through -even a drunken stupor didn't help. I have no idea (and dont really know if I want to know) what these people were thinking about when this movie was made . And to think the movie was actually released by some company! I have watched some incredible movies in my life and actually enjoy B-movies alot. But this one is a total loss. save your pennies and watch plan 9 instead.
Reply #16. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Slartibartfast
Do I smell an Oscar?
Oops, nope... That's just the pigs. My mistake.
This movie is simply offal.
|Pages: 1  3 4 5 |