PUPPET MASTER III
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| Rated R
| | Copyright 1991 Full Moon Pictures
| | Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
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- Andre Toulon - Creator of magical living puppets, obviously an amateur gunsmith as well.
- Else Toulon - Shot by Nazis, then resurrected as the Leech Woman puppet.
- Dr. Hess - Scientist trying to save the Reich from disaster, he plans to make a serum which will animate dead soldiers to fight once more. Dies after being stabbed.
- Peter - Young boy that becomes Toulon's apprentice. Needs to knock off the knockwurst or he will never get rid of that baby fat.
- General Mueller - Usually level headed, but his tendency to get naked caused me much pain. Imagine a hairy bleached prune...
- The Puppets - In no particular order, they are: Six-Shooter, Leech Woman, Blade, Pinhead, Tunneler, and Jester. All are devoted companions to Toulon and willing to do anything for him.
- Major Kraus - Richard Lynch! Not above shooting women and being generally nasty to other people, pretty much a Nazi poster boy. Turned into a human puppet then dropped onto a battle axe.
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I have commented a few times on the dubious worth of sequels. In fact, some of them have caused an observation that sequels should have warning labels. "May Cause Drowsiness" and "Government studies have shown that sequels can reduce the likelihood of you renting other films in this series" would be pretty common.
The premise is fairly sound; during the meat grinder of World War II, Germany is experiencing a severe manpower shortage. Persecuting a political satirist who has the power to animate wooden puppets is a natural progression of logic. Hey, it's better than creating one elf that can impregnate a woman on Christmas and make her give birth to Aryans. Mein Gott!
Having been unfairly deprived of his wife the puppet master is an emotional wreck, but he does vow revenge on the Nazis. Toulon masterminds the merciless attacks, none of which are very interesting. Well, except for Kraus, having hooks put into your flesh and then hoisted aloft like a tortured, screaming, and bleeding marionette is an attention grabber. Too bad that was a unique moment (as in the only one) of entertainment in this film.
One of the major problems is the "Germans." Some of these guys are so not German that it is not funny. I mean, if you saw them eating apple pie and playing baseball it should not come as a surprise. Plus the only time anyone says something in German is to remind us, the audience, that this is Germany. Plenty of other films are guilty, but attach said words "auf Deutsche" to some guy from the Bronx and it stands out like John Holmes at a nudist colony.
Some interesting background is included in the film, including the fact that Toulon's puppets are all dear friends who were killed. Now who could be killing people without remorse in Germany around 1941? Maybe the Nazis? Why in the world did it take him so long to do anything when the evil bastards were evidently killing his friends left and right? Killing a man's wife is certainly terrible, but even if someone "only" murdered several of my friends they had better invest in Kevlar.
Anyway, the idea that he imbues his creations with some of the essence of departed friends is interesting. Problem is, it entirely screws up his reaction to the Leech Woman being destroyed in Puppet Master II.
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| Things I Learned From This Movie: | |
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- Hitler had a great and overwhelming fear of cowboys.
- Germans take their shoes very seriously.
- If you need a man's cooperation then shooting his wife is a step in the wrong direction.
- Not only did drugstores once stock leeches, but they had them in the jumbo size.
- German hookers are fairly attractive and, unfortunately, terrible in bed.
- Nazis did not exactly support social activists, unless you count martyring them.
- When leeches are falling out of the sky make sure to close your mouth.
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- 11 mins - I thought that when Germans fell over they yelled, "Mein leiben!"
- 13 mins - These two are so in love, she must die soon.
- 15 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
- 24 mins - They are going to set the building on fire? Why not use it for something rather than possibly burning the entire neighborhood down?
- 34 mins - He reincarnated his wife as a puppet full of leeches? There must be some interesting social commentary Freud could say about this.
- 38 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST JARS!
- 44 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
- 45 mins - Six-Shooter just fired seven shots, maybe he is misnamed?
- 48 mins - A little tiki torch, just like you can buy at K-Mart...
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| | Audio clips in wav format | SOUNDS | Starving actors speak out | |
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| File | Dialog |  | pupmasteriii1.wav
| Peter: "Puppets need to sleep?"
Toulon: "Puppets need sleep just as much as you do."
| | pupmasteriii2.wav
| Stein: "Herr Toulon has developed a method of animating his puppets without string."
| | pupmasteriii3.wav
| Toulon: "Goodnight, fellow puppeteer."
| | pupmasteriii4.wav
| Hess: "But what gives them life?"
Toulon: "The will to live! I knew each of them before they were cut down by the Nazis, and they all wanted the same thing. The chance to go on fighting!"
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| | Click for a larger image | IMAGES | Scenes from the movie | |
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| | Watch a scene | VIDEO | MPEG video files | |
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 | pupmasteriii1.mpg
- 2.1m
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| Six-Shooter pumps that old polecat Mueller full of lead, though it looks like a thinner man jumps, er, falls out the window. Make sure to count the number of shots fired while you are at it, sneaky little puppet has a seventh arm hidden somewhere.
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| | Leave a comment | EXTRAS | Buy the movie | |
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| Puppet Master III
Reply #9. Posted on June 14, 2002, 03:04:30 PM by
Best one of the series I lked when Tunneler drilled that guys back and came out of his stomach
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| Puppet Master III
Reply #10. Posted on September 02, 2002, 11:51:09 AM by Wagieballs
Not just 3! all of the puppet masters were the best thing Full Moon ever did!!!
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Reply #11. Posted on May 09, 2006, 12:49:30 PM by Sara
I have been a fan of all of the puppet master moives. Moving killer dolls scare me. Blade is my favorite puppet. He is the coolest killer puppet ever.
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Reply #12. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by bootytalk
This reffers to cwestfa1@twcny.rr.com's comment about puppet master 3.You are right they are chronologicly wrong
but dont all these puppet master movies have problems like this. Just because you think you are a 11th grade World history Teacher dosent make you a good movie critict. Puppet master 3 still rocks just avoid curse of the puppet master it is the worst of the series.
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Reply #13. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by PuppetMistress
This movie was great because of Six-Shooter. He is just too cool and that scene with him climbing up the wall like a spider was marvelous. (I'm a huge fan of stop motion.)
Of course I will forever love Blade and that adorable Jester. Man if he was real I'd be stealing him from Toulon and letting him live in my house in his own room. ^_^ ::hugs Mr. Hans::
Yeah, I'm kinda weird. But I love PM so who cares? LOL
~Ami~
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Reply #14. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Alex
Awesome... I love puppets and dolls, and I have some of my own puppet friends and two puppet children, a boy and girl(one is actually a Curious George doll), and I have a blue hand puppet called Duncan Greeley, who's a CPA. Yeah, I loved these movies, because everytime I watched them two decades ago(currently 2006 c.e.) I could actually 'smell rubber and plastic' by just watching the stop motion awesomeness!
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| Re: Puppet Master III
Reply #15. Posted on December 30, 2007, 02:15:16 PM by Jeff
 Thi Sucks
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| Re: Puppet Master III
Reply #16. Posted on June 16, 2008, 03:33:35 PM by Midnightycyn
I enjoy this website tremendously but I think you;ve come a cropper on this one. Of all the Puppet Master movies, this is the 0one with the best acting, best writing, and best self-contained plot. I think the remarks about fighting the nazi's after the deaths of friends is a bit unrealistic, but kill one's soulmate and there would definitely be more reason to react. Furthermore, it was clear his life, as he knew it, was over, so he had nothing left to lose.
It's not a perfect movie but it is far from a failure, and definitely not the worst of the series.
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