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| I hope you are ready for this movie. If you are not, it is going to hit you out of nowhere like a truck. The really dangerous issue is the "seamless integration" of suitmation, super-marionation, and animation.
Before I get rolling and hurt someone, let me explain. The narration (lots of ations in this movie) informs us that dinosaurs did not die off as previously believed. The huge reptiles burrowed deep into the Earth and evolved into supermonsters. Under the direction of their emperor, Tyrannus, the creatures now seek to destroy mankind. The dinosaurs are almost always realized by placing some poor actor in a rubber suit. The Gemini Force is a group of four individuals who are pledged to protect humanity. For the most part, the "movie's" (I suspect this was a failed kids' show) human characters are animated. Change their uniforms and they could be dropped into "Starblazers" or "Battle of the Planets." Last, but not least, the Gemini Force uses a giant transport aircraft and an armored train/tank hybrid. The vehicles would be right at home in Gerry Anderson's "Thunderbirds" series.
Are you okay? Are you still with me?
Lord Tyrannus sends a Tyrannosaurus to destroy mankind. The supermonster surfaces near a pair of cartoon hunters who are out with their cartoon dogs. It blasts the Dalmations with a red ray that turns them into like colored killer canines. The two men are ripped to pieces and the red dogs begin biting other dogs. The bites create even more red dogs. Pretty soon a plague of vicious red pooches is tearing up the countryside. Team Gemini is sent to stop the beasts from entering the city.
The horde of killer canines is stopped at the bridge, though it takes lasers fired at full power to stun them. Also, and sorry for not mentioning this before, the back half of the train/tank splits off and starts flying around. Jim and Gem remain in the command module, but their companions use the rear section to provide air cover (it has other uses too). The vehicle assigned to Jerry and Wally looks like a large, flying dumpster. By now you should understand why my wife spent the first thirty minutes of the movie giggling uncontrollably.
Just when they thought the situation was under control, the Tyrannosaurus controlling the dogs rears his ugly head. The weapons systems are ineffective against the monster, so Jim and Gem decide to change into Gemini. By touching wrists and engaging their bionics, the two siblings are merged into a superhuman being. Gem's soul (or something) is left bereft of a body, speaking in echoing tones from a web of energy, while Jim develops some feminine features and prominent ears. The vehicle also undergoes a complete metamorphosis, gaining a drill bit nose, spikes, and wings with circular saw blades on the tips.
The downside to the Gemini transfer is that the brother and sister team can only remain merged for three and a half minutes. Would carbo-loading extend that time limit? I do not know, but they handily defeat the Tyrannosaurus with only seconds to spare. They saw its head off! The supermonster falls over, subsequently exploding in a hail of sparks. Jerry and Wally use the dumpster to put out stray fires before joining the others.
I swear on my mother's grave that this is all true. No way could I be making it up.
A couple of things happen in almost every battle. The dinosaur controls a type of creature, two hapless pieces of human meat get munched, Jim and Gem are forced to merge when normal weapons fail to stop the monster, and a fire is extinguished by the flying dumpster. If the different fights were the same duration you could probably set your watch by the events.
The next attack is a pterosaur (not a dinosaur, but close enough) controlling a colony of giant bats. Two cartoon hikers stumble into the cave and immediately get et, then the bat swarm takes out a helicopter (crewed by two people). Following that, the pterosaur leads his bat army in an attack against the city. The Gemini Force is in trouble, because Gem is trapped inside a building that the bats are attacking, while the rest of the team is outside in the vehicles. The rubber bats bounce off the outside of the building before finding an open door. Once inside, they bounce off doors and walls.
My description of the special effects used here is dead accurate. The bats are rubber and suspended on fishing line. Somebody jiggles the props up and down, then abruptly smacks them into stuff. Egad, I thought myself too jaded to stare slack-jawed at a movie. I was wrong.
The bats are dispersed with anti-bat ordinance, but that only makes the supermonster enter the fray. Jim tells Jerry and Wally to take the flying dumpster and distract the monster; they immediately comply. (How many Jerry and Wallys does the team go through in a month?) With the pterosaur's attention elsewhere, Jim is able to rescue his sister from the damaged building. They immediately transform into Gemini and the supermonster's life expectancy drops dramatically.
Okay, next monster. A stegosaurus commands a huge army of red rats to destroy an oil refinery. There are two subplots in this segment, one about a little girl who apparently hates rats and the second a fight between Jim and Gem - over a blouse! Dude, you have been spending too much time merged with your sister lately.
The red rat army does severe damage to the refinery by chewing through pipes and storage tanks (wow, just plain wow). To stop the supermonster and his minions, Jim and Gem must become Gemini, but Dr. Kharmady warns that they cannot until their personal problems are resolved. Jim smacks his sister before climbing out of the armored vehicle to save the little girl's male guardian (brother, father, I do not know). The male part of Gemini blasts away at the stegosaurus with a pistol and is about to get mashed when his sister saves the day with her pistol. I imagine that Dr. Kharmady was watching all this, shaking his head sadly. Billions spent on research and equipment, but his commanders resort to handguns. The two idiots eventually climb back into the vehicle and transform into Gemini. End of stegosaurus.
The last battle was fun since I got to say, "Red rat! Red rat!" over and over.
A rampaging styracosaurus, terribly misidentified as a triceratops, is the next attacker. For some odd reason it does not control any animals, plus the Gemini Force kicks its butt without transforming. This flies in the face of Gem observing that the supermonster was very strong. Maybe it was opposite day and her saying that actually meant the styracosaurus was a puss.
The bleeding supermonster burrows to safely, leaving Jim troubled. Why did it attack a humble suburb? What was the true intent of the assault? Jerry wants to rescue some people who are trapped in a damaged tower, but the commander insists on staying alert and together. Watching helpless civilians die does not bode well with the junior team member; he mutinies. The flying dumpster detaching is just what Tyrannus wanted. The wounded supermonster resurfaces and attacks, inflicting a concussion on Jim before retreating. The king dinosaur's true intent is revealed when a Tyrannosaurus emerges and begins spraying radioactive dust everywhere.
Can the heroes stop the pair of supermonsters? Jim's head wound means that the Gemini transfer is potentially fatal, but without the extraordinary powers of Gemini and his (er, her, its, their... ...aw, forget it) drill ship, all may be lost.
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| Things I Learned From This Movie: | |
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 | The Japanese version of the Pentagon is much smaller. In fact, it is a table.
| | There is a reason that CNN, not Cartoon Network, covers disaster stories.
| | The last hope of all mankind is a cybernetic hermaphrodite suffering from split personality disorder.
| | Earthquakes cause airplanes to shake too.
| | Hikers should always carry a portable radio in case the dinosaurs unexpectedly return.
| | Japanese building codes require that any skyscraper be able to support a main battle tank landing on the roof.
| | Exposing your soft underbelly is not the best way to win a battle.
| | Even superhuman heroes should wear seat belts and helmets.
| | Disobeying a direct order is hilarious.
| | Sloths are the result of breeding raccoons with monkeys.
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| 1 min - This looks like footage from "Ultraman," but, for the love of peace, it is too low budget, even for "Ultraman."
| | 5 mins - Girdler would have put this scene closer to the end of the film.
| | 13 mins - Oooof! That car was hating it.
| | 22 mins - The pterosaur is hanging upside down, from the cave ceiling. Right.
| | 30 mins - What in the world possessed these people to develop anti-bat weapons?
| | 36 mins - The physics of this scene give me a headache.
| | 62 mins - I bet that either Jan Michael Vincent or George Peppard could drive that thing.
| | 71 mins - Holy unexplained telescoping shaft Batman!
| | 79 mins - Ah, a seamless integration of animation and live action special effects.
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| | Audio clips in wav format | SOUNDS | Starving actors speak out | |
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| File | Size | Dialog |  | supermonsters1.wav
| 199k
| The narrator lays down the plot. I urge you to listen.
| | supermonsters2.wav
| 128k
| Dr. Kharmady: "We've received strange reports from Alpha Sector Three. Reliable witnesses there tell of monstrous red dogs ravaging the countryside, as well as earthquakes and fires."
Wally: "Did you say these were reliable witnesses?"
| | supermonsters3.wav
| 43k
| Jim: "The supermonster is attacking the school! Those kids are in danger!"
| | supermonsters4.wav
| 147k
| Pterosaur: "I am here, oh great and mighty Tyrannus. What is your will?"
Tyrannus: "I have used my power to infect the bats with a thirst for blood and destruction. Lead them against the humans!"
| | supermonsters5.wav
| 67k
| Dr. Kharmady: "This is a real emergency! The supermonsters have sent a triceratops to the outer suburbs of the city."
| | supermonsters6.wav
| 79k
| Jim: "Don't tell me my duty!"
Jerry: "Tell me Jim, there's a rumor going around the base that when the professor installed your Gemini circuitry he also took out your heart."
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| | Click for a larger image | IMAGES | Scenes from the movie | |
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| | Watch a scene | VIDEO | MPEG video files | |
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 | supermonsters1.mpg
- 3.1m
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| The Gemini Force has just arrived and is engaging the "triceratops" that threatens the city. The dinosaur's voice is the same as Lord Tyrannus', but do not let that distract you from the monster calling the train/tank a "stupid toy."
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| | Leave a comment | EXTRAS | Buy the movie | |
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| Attack of the Supermonsters
Reply #1. Posted on March 17, 2003, 06:53:21 PM by Launcelot Rolaids
This is one hilarious cartoon. The dinosaurs are men in rubber suits and the people are cartoons.
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Reply #2. Posted on November 25, 2006, 05:10:12 PM by Andrew
<I>The following information was submitted by John Cassidy.</I> The show was produced by Tsuburaya Productions (famous as the makers of ULTRAMAN), and aired on TV Tokyo from 10/7/1977 to 6/30/1978, with a total of 39 episodes. The stock footage you saw in the beginning . . . FEW scenes are from ULTRAMAN, but others are from ULTRA SEVEN and the TV series MIGHTY JACK (which Sandy Frank ravaged into a feature-length film), and most of the monster footage is from other Tsuburaya superhero shows such as FIREMAN from 1973 and the first episode of ULTRAMAN LEO from 1974. The brother and sister who combine into the Aizenborg pilot are named Zen Tachibana (Jim Starbuck) and Ai Tachibana (Gem Starbuck). BTW, Ai and Zen are Japanese for "love" and "truth," respectively. The Aizenborg-Go is the name of the ship they pilot. In Episode 20, the ship is replaced by the Ultra-guy you see in the big picture named Aizenbo. Tyrannus is originally called Ururu, and as you guessed, he is a fugitive from Tsuburaya's older production THE LAST DINOSAUR. He too was phased out in # 20 by that alien guy at the bottom named Space Demon King Gottes. <A HREF=" http://www.thai-toku-v3.us/koro/HERO70/123.jpg"> http://www.thai-toku-v3.us/koro/HERO70/123.jpg</A> Here's the main index from where the image came from (this is based on a whole encyclopedia of 70s Japanese superheroes)! <A HREF=" http://www.thai-toku-v3.us/koro/HERO70/"> http://www.thai-toku-v3.us/koro/HERO70/</A> |
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Reply #3. Posted on November 25, 2006, 05:10:12 PM by Brother Ragnarok
Just finished watching a copy of this I found for two bucks at a pawn shop, and holy crap. I read the review and discovered many of our jokes (Hitler and "red rat") were the same. Great minds and all.
If anyone knows how I can find the rest of the series, please get ahold of me. I love you long time.
Brother R
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Reply #4. Posted on November 25, 2006, 05:09:49 PM by Lee
Yes, a very funny series...believe it or not, it was a big hit in the middle east(particularly in saudi arabia) and in Italy around the mid 80's
Very appealing series for kids...when my dad worked in Riyaad, i was raised on it.
Now its great for a laugh...theres more tho...it series 5 onwards, jim and gem can combine (in the flying supermachine thing) to become this huge robot thing the size of the dinosaurs...so he can take them on single handedly...looks a bit like ultraman but better.
There are actually 10 series episodes with 4 parts in each
for a 70's kids show, i reckon it aint all that bad - a lot better than the shit we see today. If anyone wants pics, feel free to email me.
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Reply #5. Posted on November 25, 2006, 05:10:12 PM by Steve Bentley
I own this thing! I bought it several years ago from a video store for my wifes little brother, and watching it with him, found I couldn't part with it! There is another movie made from this same series called "Return of the Dinosaurs", but the dub and edit seem to have changed the entire concept. Search for it! I urge you! It is as bad and even funnier!
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Reply #6. Posted on December 23, 2002, 12:40:09 PM by Josie
I <i>must</i> see this...
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Reply #7. Posted on December 21, 2002, 10:19:59 PM by Eric
My friends and I (who are seasoned bad movie watchers) were absolutely stunned by the total ineptitude of this movie. It still makes us laugh uncontrolably. This is a MUST. Trust me on this one.
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Reply #8. Posted on November 25, 2006, 05:10:12 PM by Mark
Oh my... I bought this movie on half.com this past week, it showed up the other day, and my friend and I (he's got three... count em THREE Turkish movies) watched in utter disbelief last night. It looks like 4 TV shows smacked together, they reused so much footage, we were quoting dialogue before it happened. It really is worth $10 to buy and keep. Seemless? I don't know... Funny? Oh my, yes. The "dumpster" also has a plow on the front, perhaps for when the team needs to do emergency snow removal.
So much of this is just bizarre, what's up with the sloth? And the amazing telescoping cylinder is really great. Enjoy this movie!!
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Little girls will happily substitute a big, ugly toad for a doll. 