TICKS
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| Rated R
| | Copyright 1993 Republic Pictures Corp.
| | Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
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- Charles and Holly - Leaders of the youth group, Holly's entire contribution to the plot is providing Charles a sperm dump.
- Melissa - Charles' anti-social daughter. Yep, put him in charge of more kids.
- Panic - Kleptomaniac gang member who loves his dog. He turns into a giant tick...
- Tyler - Nerd kid who is scared of being left alone. (Isn't the woods peaceful Tyler? No crowds...)
- Kelly - Introvert Asian girl who hates fish.
- Rome and Dee Dee - The horny kids on this trip.
- Sir and Jerry - Two marijuana growers intent on protecting their crop. Both become tick meals.
- Jarvis - Marijuana grower whose herbal steroid mutates the ticks. Becomes a human breeding ground and pops.
- The Ticks - Softball sized ticks with a hallucinogenic toxin.
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The premise is bad, I'll admit, but you have to love the sight of a softball-sized tick scuttling across the floor. Add to this a group of dysfunctional teenagers and two demented marijuana growers and you've got a plot! The special effects aren't so special but they're gooey; for some reason mutated ticks are covered in slime.
A group of inner city youths is participating in a program where they are taken into the woods and given access to hatchets and fire. Great idea! Generation X doesn't get a chance to regress though, they are soon beset by horror of horrors: Jerry and "Sir." Through a complicated course of events only one of the kids is killed and a forest fire kills the ticks. Except one, attached to the bottom of their van... |
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| Things I Learned From This Movie: | |
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- Calming music does not belong in scenes involving tire blowouts.
- Kids always carry flash paper.
- Tick pods are full of maple syrup.
- If something is burrowing under the skin of your chest don't shoot at it you moron.
- Herbal steroids will cause massive mutations in wood ticks, um, because they have wood in their name...
- Being stabbed in the knee does little to impede movement.
- Never send a brain-damaged idiot to fetch the van.
- Anabolic steroids are painkillers.
- Giant ticks will explode spectacularly if touched by flame.
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- 7 mins - I've been looking at this machine for about 2 minutes and still have no idea what it's intent is.
- 25 mins - This slow "pan up the wall" scene is painfull.
- 36 mins - Hey Panic! Did you say, "Brutus?" Would he move? (you'll have to watch the movie)
- 45 mins - Nobody is freaking out that this dead dog's body is jumping around?
- 62 mins - Flame retardant Christmas tree ad...
- 70 mins - It's supposedly night but that is definately sunlight.
- 84 mins - I'm sorry? The van magically moved closer? And how did Tyler get into the driver's seat so fast?
- 85 mins - Who left a trail of gas to the propane tank?
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| | Audio clips in wav format | SOUNDS | Starving actors speak out | |
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| File | Dialog |  | ticks1.wav
| Panic: "See, they call me 'Panic' cause I never do."
| | ticks2.wav
| Charles: "And poor Kelly, a prisoner of her own troubled mind. In the end, I fear this group will not successfully bond, despite their common antagonist."
| | ticks3.wav
| Vet: "A wood tick!"
Charles: "Ticks do not get this big."
Vet: "It's a tick. Severely altered, but a tick all the same."
| | ticks4.wav
| Jerry: "Yeah, they bite like a son of a bitch."
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| | Click for a larger image | IMAGES | Scenes from the movie | |
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| | Watch a scene | VIDEO | MPEG video files | |
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| | Leave a comment | EXTRAS | Buy the movie | |
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