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XANADU - 1 Slime
Rated PG
Copyright 1980 Universal Pictures
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Kira - Olivia Newton John! Muse and organic mood ring supreme, one moment she's glowing blue, then orange, etc.
  • Sonny - Starving artist and nice guy, except he throws all his trash out the window.
  • Danny - Gene Kelly! Rich man who is unhappy with life until deciding to build Xanadu.
  • Simpson - Sonny's old boss, pretty much a run of the mill evil corporate overlord.
  • The Other Starving Artists - Sonny's friends.
  • Dancers - Also the daughters of Zeus, after noticing their ethnic diversity I'd say he gets around.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

What has Olivia Newton John, Gene Kelly, roller skates, lots of glowing blue people, quasi disco music, and never ends?

Exactly - Hell.

Living in this fairy tale torture chamber is Sonny, he is an artist with talent, at painting album covers at least. This is why Kira, daughter of Zeus and inspiration for fine art everywhere, decides he is the only one who can make Xanadu happen. With Danny providing venture capital of course. All of this nicely explains the decline of Greek civilization, Zeus and his siblings are spending their time opening roller skate dance clubs. Meanwhile the Greek population is burning goats at a furious pace hoping for a little help against these Roman fellows. ("Could we have another Alexander please, this disco thing you turned us on to is very nice, but now everyone else wants to kick our ass.") Did I mention the two lovers briefly change into a Don Bluth animation? Where's a bucket of dip when you need it...

This review is dedicated to Jenn Reinhart, recently my friend Todd and the young lady exchanged vows. Love works in odd ways, couldn't you have found a woman with less offensive social problems? (Jenn likes this movie.) Making body noises in crowded elevators maybe?

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Artists are litterbugs.
  • Most Skittles commercials were inspired by Olivia Newton John.
  • Gene Kelly can play the clarinet.
  • Mopeds are slower than roller skating women.
  • Dubbing tap scenes was beyond 1980's technology.
  • Gene Kelly does not look good in a pink pimp suit.
  • Zeus can't tell time.
  • If you use the same group of dancers over and over the one Asian girl is going to stand out.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 1 min - Let me guess, each time the changing craft orbits we get one title. Darn, I'm right...
  • 5 mins - Where in the hell did we get dancing blue people from?
  • 15 mins - How did Gene Kelly get to the pier so fast?
  • 24 mins - Enough with the screwy dissolves.
  • 37 mins - Maybe I'll get lucky and these two morons will skate into that huge fan.
  • 49 mins - You got your 80's all over my 40's. Hey, your 40's are all over my 80's...
  • 60 mins - That disturbed me.
  • 73 mins - Dude, skate through the wall, it'll work! Do it! Yes, build up speed, go, go! What the heck, that worked? Gads I hate this film.
  • 90 mins - Olivia Newton John is singing country, everything going black, mommy...

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note xanadu1.wav Sonny: "I run into this girl this morning. Never saw before in my life; she kisses me and disappears."
Danny: "What's so weird about that?"
Green Music Note xanadu2.wav Simpson: "If you start making changes, then other people start making changes, and before you know it you have a lot of people running around doing what they want to do. That's not a company."
Green Music Note xanadu3.wav Kira: "You're supposed to be an artist. Use your imagination."
Sonny: "Oh thanks a lot; I'm all out."
Green Music Note xanadu4.wav Kira: "I come from Mount Halycon. I'm the daughter of Zeus."
Green Music NoteTheme Song Listen to a clip from the soundtrack.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipxanadu1.mpg - 1.9m
The movie starts with dancing blue people. I am saying my prayers and looking for some hard alcohol to dull the pain.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 10 11 [12] 13
Re: Xanadu
Reply #89. Posted on February 26, 2007, 09:20:30 PM by RCMerchant
Xanadu?XANADU!?!?XANADU!!!!!! OH NONONONON!PLEASEGODHELPME!!!
Re: Xanadu
Reply #90. Posted on March 14, 2007, 03:33:02 PM by amabush
The bit I hate is at the very end, where the ghastly wooden faced leading man starts to chat up the hat check girl, just because she looks like 'Kira'. Just goes to show how little he thoughtv of her personality and how much he thought about her looks.. Jeff Lynne's songs are GREAT though
Re: Xanadu
Reply #91. Posted on October 18, 2007, 09:45:20 AM by Andoc
Oh God.... Xanadu (weirdest name for a musical?). Well, I'll begin by saying I consider this movie fit to use as torture on those people you despise the most, or perhaps as anice way to traumatize little children. I remember watching this on video with a few friends back in high school, we were all wondering what the hell this thing was, or if we had to be smoking pot or something to enjoy it.

Lastly, I have to say that the final musical number inside Xanadu where everyone (even Gene Kelly, WTH?) dances with roller skates and there's this weird bunch of girls hanging from ropes and spinning and cowgirls and other crap is probably among the trippiest things I've ever seen in a movie.
Re: Xanadu
Reply #92. Posted on October 18, 2007, 06:28:38 PM by Susan
i may as well add my contribution. I loved the movie growing up - watchability factor now? Dunno, I think it woulld be fun. Bad acting, stupid plot, but seriously it was eye candy. Costumes and theatrics that maybe only a girl or very musical loving man could love.

But - the soundtrack is awesome. I love the combination of swing and rock in some of the songs. and I LOVE ELO

so there
Re: Xanadu
Reply #93. Posted on May 23, 2008, 12:06:52 AM by Spence
Okay. I think your site is pretty solid. But THIS movie is one of my favorites. Also, alot of people would agree with me. HOWEVER! I must say that the guy who played Sonny was the worst actor I've ever seen on the screen. Did you see his reaction when Kiera scared him? There was, like, no facial change. Wierd. ANYWAY!!! The music in this by ELO and Olivia does't go with what's happening on-screen the best, but it's still CLASSIC, GREAT music (if you like disco, especially)! Also there's great acting by Olivia and Gene. Sonny guy SUX. I get it.
Re: Xanadu
Reply #94. Posted on March 11, 2009, 10:20:53 PM by Sarah
I have a friend who is obsessed with this movie and he makes all of his friends watch it every year on his birthday.  We usually just try to get blackout drunk in order to make it less painfull.....
Re: Xanadu
Reply #95. Posted on December 18, 2009, 06:05:40 AM by Lex
This movie has all the makings of failure. Disco? Come on! By 1980 the thing was dying... It doesn't help that the thing has aged poorly. Yeesh! The overall quality of this movie is just one of disaster.

Well guess what? This movie is awesome! Bad quality does not mean a movie can't be entertaining and Xanadu was one of the most entertaining movies of all time. One drop? You sir are wrong...
Re: Xanadu
Reply #96. Posted on February 27, 2010, 08:46:35 PM by Tosh
I have to say Thank you for that review! I saw this in the theatre when it was released and Until now I hadn't realized the movie had a plot! I jst thought they'd strung a bunch of dancing scenes together and Gene Kelly moments and sent it out...
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