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ARMY OF DARKNESS - 4 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1992 Dino De Laurentiis Communications
Reviewed by Tenchi on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Ash - As bad-ass as they come. S-Mart Employee (an actual store) who gets sucked into the time portal at the end of the previous movie and finds out he's the chosen one who can stop the evil dead. (See Evil Dead 1 & 2 for more details).
  • Shelia - Very beautiful maiden. Hates Ash at first because she thinks he is a member of the army of a rival lord. She later falls in love with him and they have sex in front of a fire.
  • King Arthur - Not THE King Arthur. The leader of the people that capture Ash. He is the real honor and valor type, and doesn't like Ash that much in the beginning because he thinks Ash is a "loud-mouth Braggart" but learns to respect him.
  • Henry the Red - Leader of a kingdom that is a rival to the Arthur's. Ends up helping the King and Ash defeat the Army of Darkness.
  • Wiseman - Your wise old guy type who believes Ash is the chosen one when he falls from the sky.
  • The Little Ashes - Formed when Ash breaks a possessed reflection of himself in a mirror. They screw around with him some and torture him in ways I couldn't take. Despite the size difference, Ash manages to kill only one of them. These guys are funny as hell.
  • Evil Ash - An evil twin formed when Ash swallows one of the little Ashes. Leader of the Army of Darkness. Gets killed by Ash twice, once with a point blank shot with his twelve gauge, and a second time after being shot off of a catapult with a bag of gun powder.
  • The Army of Darkness - A bunch of dead soldiers who arise from the grave after Ash picks up the Necronomicon without saying the proper words to uncurse it.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Ash, the hero of "Evil Dead" and "Evil Dead II" gets taken back to medieval times after being sucked into a time portal at the end of the last movie. The soldiers who find him think he is a soldier of the opposing army, while the wizard tries to convince the king that he is the chosen one. Ash gets thrown into a pit with two of the evil dead, both of whom are killed thanks to his chainsaw and twelve gauge, so everyone is convinced he's the chosen one. The wizard tells Ash that he has to retrieve the Necronomicon because it contains the passages that can return him to his own time and stop the evil. Before he leaves, Ash makes himself a new hand from a glove on a suit of armor. On his way to the location of the book, he runs into his evil reflections while hiding out in a windmill. I'm not going to go into detail, but he spawns an evil twin from swallowing a little Ash. After a brief conflict, he kills his evil twin and buries him. Before he picks up the book, he forgets the sacred words he was supposed to say that would uncurse the book and tries to BS his way through it. Big mistake. This causes the army of Darkness, along with his evil twin, to arise from the dead. Ash returns with the book, but when everyone realizes he didn't say the words, they lose faith in him. Sheila even loses faith with him and gets kidnapped by a demon and becomes possessed. Everybody feels like deserting and running from the Army of Darkness, but Ash convinces them to stay and fight. He decides to up the ante by doing things like making arrows loaded with gunpowder and turning his car into a death-tank. They start out pretty well against the Army of Darkness, but once the AoD get inside the castle, all hell breaks loose. Ash is attacked by the possessed Princess, but sticks her with a spear and throws her off of a tower. Eric the Red comes along and finally turns the tide against the Army of Darkness. A truce is made between Henry the Red and Arthur, Shelia becomes unpossessed, and they all live happily ever after. Ash returns to his own time and goes back to his job in the Housewares department, but did he really stop the Evil Dead for good?

Interesting Trivia: In Japan, this movie was titled: Captain Supermarket

There actually is a S-Mart in Texas (Houston I think). If you ask, they'll give you the Army of Darkness tour, which includes the Housewares Dept (Ash's area of expertise), and where they keep the guns.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Time/space portals end at some place in which you will drop about 50 feet. Fortunately, mats will be there to break your fall.
  • There are deserts in England.
  • Don't screw with Bruce Campbell and especially don't whip him.
  • Kill Deadites and women will go from hating you to wanting to bang you.
  • Don't under estimate little versions of yourself.
  • Don't take your aggressions out on a stove pipe, no matter how many times you hit your head on it.
  • It doesn't matter who's bad or who's good, the only thing that matters is who's the guy with the gun.
  • Evil twins are a pain in the ass.
  • When someone tells you to remember some words, you'd better damn well remember them.
  • Your Chevrolet turned death tank isn't worth destroying over your possessed gal.
  • Bruce Campbell is the God of Ass-Kicking, and don't your forget it.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note armydark1.wav Duke Henry: "I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands, and leader of its peoples."
Ash: "Well, hello Mr. Fancy Pants! I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: jack and s**t, and jack left town."
Green Music Note armydark2.wav *BOOM!*
Ash: "Yeah. All right you primitive screwheads, listen up. See this? This is my BOOMSTICK!"
Green Music Note armydark3.wav Ash tries to BS his way through saying the magic words.
Green Music Note armydark4.wav Deadite Sheila: "You found me beautiful once."
Ash: "Honey, you got real ugly."
Deadite Sheila: *SHRIEKS*
Note: most women will respond this way to a similar conversation.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Cliparmydark1.mpg - 5.4m
Ash takes on a Deadite hag.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 3 4 [5] 6 7 ... 10
Army of Darkness
Reply #33. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by James Perry
I rented this when it first hit the video store and was somewhat disappointed.  I expected Ray Harryhausen, but got some "ripoff".  Now, before you fillet and broil me over a torch flame...I was from the school of Jason & The Argonauts and Sinbad & The Eye Of The Tiger AT THE TIME.  But 2002 I gave this another try, along with the others in the series (as a part of my yearly Halloween month with 3 horror movies a day) and fell in love with all of them!  They were the highlight!  Change ripoff to inspired, I think.  The Harryhousen stuff is great!  And how about the 3 Stooges?!  Hurt yourself funny!  I bought 2 copies...one with and one without the awesome extra footage (inspired by The Time Machine, I do believe).  These will be highlights from now on...
Army of Darkness
Reply #34. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by James Perry
I've been reading "If Chins Could Kill" by Bruce.  Damn good read!  I grew up much like him except I ended up in a lame small town radio job (REAL radio is dying, in case you didn't know).  But these films are superb examples of jumping into filmmaking and going from b-movie to big budget Hollywood.  These guys deserved everything they have!  If I could go back in time I'd volunteer to be their voice guy.  I can hear it now, BRUCE: "Here comes that weirdass Jimmy guy who just moved into the neighborhood and says he knows the future.  Sam, he says you'll make a zillion dollars turning Spider-man into a movie.  Ha ha haha!  And I'll write a book called 'If Chins Could Kill'.  HA HAHA!"
Army of Darkness
Reply #35. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Thomas Sutton
I love this movie I've seen the directors cut at least 100 times, and I'm not just saying that when I was little my older brother's friend would bring to our house when he came over so I saw it almost every month if not week fom about ages 6-9 and it never got old i still watch a lot now but I've only actually seen the theatrical release's ending 2 or 3 times I thought it was good but Sam Raimi's orriginal appocoliptic ending is much better.
Army of Darkness
Reply #36. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by aL
I've seen both versions of "Bruce Campbell vs. Army of Darkness" in the Boomstick Edition, and there's a hell of a lot to talk about & comment on.  To correct a quote from one of the top posts, on the Director's Cut, Ash doesn't say, "Keep your damn filthy hands out of my mouth," during that exchange with those bewiching arms, but instead "keep your damn filthy BONES out of my mouth."

Watching it with the commentary option enabled, I noticed something I didn't notice & probably wouldn't've noticed if Sam Raimi didn't mention it.  He said it was an Internet rumor that surfers swear to, but that it isn't true, and Campbell agreed with him.  After rewinding it & looking though, there's no way it can't be true.

During the scene where the classic spirit chases Ash through those alpine woods (with one eye usable, I'm hoping), it splits though 3 trees in a row, and when the final one splits, there is an odd face/mask on the left half of the split tree.  It's so obvious that it's there after he pointed it out, yet the two biggest creators say that it definitely IS NOT there -someone...just explain this to me.  Watch it, see it, and explain it to me!  Thank you!
Army of Darkness
Reply #37. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by aL
To correct my previous post, I mixed Sam & Bruce up.  Sam was so sure that there wasn't a face as he was the one who went jaw-first through that tree -but I think he just didn't notice it.
Army of Darkness
Reply #38. Posted on August 13, 2003, 09:14:30 PM by Brendon Mize
It is amazing that over four years worth of reviews are still being written for this movie.  That should be the sign of an American Classic.  Army of Darkness, hell, all of the Evil Dead Films, are right up there next to Gone With The Wind and Casablanca.  If you have a foreigner ask you what is a good American movie, tell him to Shop Smart... Shop S-Mart!
Army of Darkness
Reply #39. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Dan Lyon
"Shop smart...shop S-Mart". Incredibly fun movie, four thumbs up.
Army of Darkness
Reply #40. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Scott
I don't think it's fair to call this one a bad movie. Not on the level of so many of the other movies on this site. I mean, sure, the harness can be seen when Ash is being "sucked into the vortex", as can the pad he lands on in medieval England...and it's hard to believe that his car would run in the battle scene after dropping out of the sky like it did, or that it would conveniently have a chemistry book in the trunk...or even that the wiseman would know the modern names of all the chemicals needed to make explosives. At least it's funny and entertaining. And it has a happy ending (and a sad ending if you've got the DVD.)
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