|ARMY OF DARKNESS
|Copyright 1992 Dino De Laurentiis Communications
| Reviewed by Tenchi
on 'a long time ago'|
- Ash - As bad-ass as they come. S-Mart Employee (an actual store) who gets sucked into the time portal at the end of the previous movie and finds out he's the chosen one who can stop the evil dead. (See Evil Dead 1 & 2 for more details).
- Shelia - Very beautiful maiden. Hates Ash at first because she thinks he is a member of the army of a rival lord. She later falls in love with him and they have sex in front of a fire.
- King Arthur - Not THE King Arthur. The leader of the people that capture Ash. He is the real honor and valor type, and doesn't like Ash that much in the beginning because he thinks Ash is a "loud-mouth Braggart" but learns to respect him.
- Henry the Red - Leader of a kingdom that is a rival to the Arthur's. Ends up helping the King and Ash defeat the Army of Darkness.
- Wiseman - Your wise old guy type who believes Ash is the chosen one when he falls from the sky.
- The Little Ashes - Formed when Ash breaks a possessed reflection of himself in a mirror. They screw around with him some and torture him in ways I couldn't take. Despite the size difference, Ash manages to kill only one of them. These guys are funny as hell.
- Evil Ash - An evil twin formed when Ash swallows one of the little Ashes. Leader of the Army of Darkness. Gets killed by Ash twice, once with a point blank shot with his twelve gauge, and a second time after being shot off of a catapult with a bag of gun powder.
- The Army of Darkness - A bunch of dead soldiers who arise from the grave after Ash picks up the Necronomicon without saying the proper words to uncurse it.
|Ash, the hero of "Evil Dead" and "Evil Dead II" gets taken back to medieval times after being sucked into a time portal at the end of the last movie. The soldiers who find him think he is a soldier of the opposing army, while the wizard tries to convince the king that he is the chosen one. Ash gets thrown into a pit with two of the evil dead, both of whom are killed thanks to his chainsaw and twelve gauge, so everyone is convinced he's the chosen one. The wizard tells Ash that he has to retrieve the Necronomicon because it contains the passages that can return him to his own time and stop the evil. Before he leaves, Ash makes himself a new hand from a glove on a suit of armor. On his way to the location of the book, he runs into his evil reflections while hiding out in a windmill. I'm not going to go into detail, but he spawns an evil twin from swallowing a little Ash. After a brief conflict, he kills his evil twin and buries him. Before he picks up the book, he forgets the sacred words he was supposed to say that would uncurse the book and tries to BS his way through it. Big mistake. This causes the army of Darkness, along with his evil twin, to arise from the dead. Ash returns with the book, but when everyone realizes he didn't say the words, they lose faith in him. Sheila even loses faith with him and gets kidnapped by a demon and becomes possessed. Everybody feels like deserting and running from the Army of Darkness, but Ash convinces them to stay and fight. He decides to up the ante by doing things like making arrows loaded with gunpowder and turning his car into a death-tank. They start out pretty well against the Army of Darkness, but once the AoD get inside the castle, all hell breaks loose. Ash is attacked by the possessed Princess, but sticks her with a spear and throws her off of a tower. Eric the Red comes along and finally turns the tide against the Army of Darkness. A truce is made between Henry the Red and Arthur, Shelia becomes unpossessed, and they all live happily ever after. Ash returns to his own time and goes back to his job in the Housewares department, but did he really stop the Evil Dead for good?
Interesting Trivia: In Japan, this movie was titled: Captain Supermarket
There actually is a S-Mart in Texas (Houston I think). If you ask, they'll give you the Army of Darkness tour, which includes the Housewares Dept (Ash's area of expertise), and where they keep the guns.
|Things I Learned From This Movie:|| |
- Time/space portals end at some place in which you will drop about 50 feet. Fortunately, mats will be there to break your fall.
- There are deserts in England.
- Don't screw with Bruce Campbell and especially don't whip him.
- Kill Deadites and women will go from hating you to wanting to bang you.
- Don't under estimate little versions of yourself.
- Don't take your aggressions out on a stove pipe, no matter how many times you hit your head on it.
- It doesn't matter who's bad or who's good, the only thing that matters is who's the guy with the gun.
- Evil twins are a pain in the ass.
- When someone tells you to remember some words, you'd better damn well remember them.
- Your Chevrolet turned death tank isn't worth destroying over your possessed gal.
- Bruce Campbell is the God of Ass-Kicking, and don't your forget it.
| ||Audio clips in wav format||SOUNDS||Starving actors speak out|| |
||Duke Henry: "I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands, and leader of its peoples." |
Ash: "Well, hello Mr. Fancy Pants! I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: jack and s**t, and jack left town."
Ash: "Yeah. All right you primitive screwheads, listen up. See this? This is my BOOMSTICK!"
||Ash tries to BS his way through saying the magic words.
||Deadite Sheila: "You found me beautiful once." |
Ash: "Honey, you got real ugly."
Deadite Sheila: *SHRIEKS*
Note: most women will respond this way to a similar conversation.
| ||Click for a larger image||IMAGES||Scenes from the movie|| |
| ||Watch a scene||VIDEO||MPEG video files|| |
| ||Leave a comment||EXTRAS||Buy the movie|| |
|Army of Darkness
Reply #9. Posted on April 09, 2000, 06:01:56 PM by
I found EVIL DEAD boring, I found EVIL DEAD 2 awesome, but ARMY OF DARKNESS only made me wish that MST3K had picked it up. I thought it was too funny for its own good. The first two were serious horror, this was just childish humor. I enjoy childish horror movies, but this was ridiculous. Sam Raimi should have known better. But I'm surprised you noticed the cable on Ash's back. I had to rewind it a few times to finally see it clearly.
|Army of Darkness
Reply #10. Posted on June 01, 2000, 03:34:16 PM by Paul Westbrook
Army of Darkness is without a doubt, the best of the Evil Dead series. Bruce Cambell redefines his role as Ash, the rebel outsider who always seems to have the unfortunate task of destroying hordes of Zombies. The effects are top rate. I was fortunate to obtain the special edition, which contains both endings. Anyone on this site who wants to correspond with me, contact me, at firstname.lastname@example.org
. I will be very interested in comments on any movie related topics. Thank you.
|Army of Darkness
Reply #11. Posted on June 13, 2000, 03:54:14 PM by Pantsman
This is the cornest movie ever made......I looooved it. It was sweet. I got the collecters edition, it had the original and S-mart ending. I like the S-mart ending more. Bruce Campbell is perfect for a role as Ash. With that lantern jaw, he looks corny! How couldn't this get nominated for a oscer? Bad dialoge( hail to the king, baby), bad special effects, bad acting, Bruce Campbell. This movie had everything! Hell, even my mom liked it. Not as violent as the first two.....But just as good.}:)
|Army of Darkness
Reply #12. Posted on August 14, 2000, 08:44:46 PM by Bruno Combat
|Army of Darkness
Reply #13. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Swamprat
Okay kiddies...A love-hate situation with this one. First the hates...More money sequels just never measure up. Money, money, everywhere. But Ash isn't the totally hapless twit he was in the first two. He's a hybred now, a homegrown-self made super hero. Situations are now contrived, and predictable. Most of the humor is forced. Bruce Campbell isn't really being Ash, he's an actor doing shtick...Now the loves...Well...Bruce Campbell doing shtick! The guy is hilarious. The contrived situations, again, hilarious. I knew what was going to happen and was waiting and wanting for it. Did anyone notice that he has a double barreled shotgun, but he fires it three times before reloading it? The first time I thought I caught a typical sloppy oversite...but after keeping count through the rest of the movie...Allright Sam! That's a good one. Inside joke for the bad movie buffs! The freshness of the first two Evil Dead films is what's sorely lacking here, but Army of Darkness is still funny and worth watching. If this had been the first one made, it would have been a horror fantasy comic masterpiece...but as is, its just a souped up quasi-sequel to what was really one idea to start with. Three attempts at the same idea, each one with a little more money to work with than the one before. Evil Dead 2 is and will remain my favorite of the series. As far as the endings are concerned, I liked both the S-mart and the DVD versions. The DVD one is more fitting to the feel and spirit of the two earlier films. The S-mart ending is more of a send-up of the whole three film series in a nutshell. I laughed out loud at the S-mart ending, laughed inside while nodding my head at the DVD...I knew it was coming. If you like either of the other two films, you'll like this one. It's a fun, if not fresh, movie...and as always, Bruce Campbell doing Three Stooges shtick with the dead is a riot. A bunch of mini-Ashes running around looking for weapons is a riot. The skeleton army getting its ass kicked to pieces is a riot. Ashes one liners are a riot. This has been a great idea, but I think the series should end here. As far as I know, it has.
|Army of Darkness
Reply #14. Posted on September 03, 2000, 08:26:40 AM by B-Man
I laughed, I cried, I kissed two bucks goodbye. What can I say? Army Of Darkness, like its predecessors is just so darn likeable and engaging. Campbell's Ash will never, ever win an Oscar, which is really a shame because, in many ways, the character has evolved on the same lines as some of our greater screen heroes. That is to say yes, he's a clod-hopper, yes he seems to constantly screw up at times when he needs to be the most focused, and yes he's a real selfish ol' Jim-Jim. Like Oscar-worthy characters, however, I find myself feeling sympathetic to him, his plight, and earnestly interact with the film hoping that he will eventually succeed. Oh, and I also giggled my dang silly head off for pretty much the whole movie.
|Army of Darkness
Reply #15. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by SSG Chris H. Brown
Just finished watching "Army of Darkness" again. Lord knows how many times I've watched that film and I never grow tired of it. Even my parents thought the movie was hilarious.
I enjoyed the original ending, typical Ash luck, but I must admit I prefer the S-Mart ending. When I saw the movie in the theater I was so hoping they'd put out "Army of Darkness 2", still am hoping.
Another great thing about this film is it caused me to meet a fellow B-Movie fan here in my unit. I was talking to one of the women I know in passing from the unit and she was heading off to the PX to do some shopping. Of course I said "Shop smart," to which she responded "shop S-Mart." I stopped, looked at her and continued "Lady, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave the store." We then proceeded to do the lines for the rest of the movie from that point with me as Ash and her as the She-b***h. Needless to say other soldiers nearby just sort of looked at us with that weird look the uninitiated give.
It's great to find someone to watch B-Movies with. We've gotten together several times so far and she's just as bad as me in mocking them. Now if she just didn't already have a boyfriend but I digress from the original point of this e-mail. Hey, it's 2248 hours (10:48 P.M. in civilian time) on a Sunday night and I'm still exhausted from a long hard week and the weekend is over. Fortunately it's a short week with the 4th of July coming up.
"Army of Darkness" rocks and Bruce Campbell is the man!!!
|Army of Darkness
Reply #16. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM by Justin
The third film in the Evil Dead delivers yet again another cult classic. All though the horror aspect of the movie is far from sight, the comedy is funny. I never thought Bruce Campbell can actually BE funny. The storyline is different which gives the film series a new feel. I was surprised to see Bridget Fonda playing the role of Linda. I enjoyed the film to the to the limit. I also hope that Bruce and Sam will return with a fourth film to add to this amazing series.
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