|
|
|
| While out on a double date at the circus one of the guys thinks it would be fun to stay all night in the funhouse at the carnival. Shortly after entering the funhouse they are witness to a creature killing one of the carnival folk who he paid for... ...uh, um pleasure. They go searching for an exit, and of course when they find it, it's locked! While Buzz is trying to bust down the door Richie goes to check if the woman is really dead. While doing so decides it's a good idea to steal the killer's money. When the father comes in and find his money gone he sics the monster onto the teens and murder ensues. One person survives this whole ordeal and, big surprise, it's Amy. The Virgin. This movie was badly lit and extremely slow. (The movie is almost an hour in before anybody dies.) All I can say is I learned a lot from this movie. |
|
| Things I Learned From This Movie: | |
|
 | Bad acting does not double as concern.
| | 8 year olds are very proficient at sneaking from their homes.
| | Crazy preacher women hang out in bathrooms.
| | Sounds in the night are very similar to the sound of a cheap laser beam.
| | Hicks enjoy threatening children with guns
| | "Alive" never ever means alive (as in walking and breathing) at a circus.
| | Circus announcers are even more freaky when speaking in monotone.
| | Circuses come with standard games, animals freak shows, and strip clubs.
| | All circus folk drink... ...heavily.
| | Circus psychics aren't used to being heckled and get extremely pissy when they are.
| | Never trust a circus announcer, when they say "world of terror" the really mean tunnel of crap.
| | Circus grounds are the equivalent to a hotel for bums.
| | Stupid people come up with even stupider ideas.
| | Monsters pay for sex, and actually get it.
| | No matter how small a building looks on the outside it will always be 10 times that size inside.
| | Hicks always like beastiality jokes best.
| | Circus folk take an incredibly long time to think up simple plans.
| | It's not common knowledge that yelling into a fan does not work.
| | Circus folk will save a hideous freak, but beyond that have no care for human life.
| | Small carnival rides have large engine rooms.
| | Fuse boxes are left open for the convenience of anybody looking to kill.
|
|
|
|
| 4 mins - This is a lame attempt at creating a reason for a nude shower scene.
| | 10 mins - These two are having a fight on their first date?
| | 14 mins - Is it just me or are there always big scary dogs behind fences at night in these movies?
| | 17 mins - She just called a guy a pistol. What kind of slang is that?
| | 18 mins - This guy just pulled a gun on a helpless kid, and I thought I was sadistic.
| | 20 mins - An animal freak show.
| | 22 mins - Am I seeing right or is that a strip club at a circus?
| | 38 mins - Funhouse props waving gang signs!
| | 40 mins - Hey, they finally entered the funhouse.
| | 58 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A SHELF!!
| | 59 mins - The monster finally unmasked. Only 36 minutes to start this story.
| | 70 mins - The first teen is killed. Wait a sec. the monster had nothing to do with that death.
| | 85 mins - Watch the monster bust through the door, looked like paper to me.
| | 91 mins - Ouch, being pulled through gears must suck.
| | 94 mins - Credits, imagine my joy.
|
|
|
| | Leave a comment | EXTRAS | Buy the movie | |
|
|
|
Little girls will happily substitute a big, ugly toad for a doll. 